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Story
November 13, 1868
The Bedford Gazette
Bedford, Bedford County, Pennsylvania
What is this article about?
A young Universalist clergyman at a western convention shares his vial of cayenne pepper with a curious Hoosier, who mistakes it for 'red salt,' suffers a burning mishap, and quips about the parson carrying 'hellfire' in his pocket, tying into Universalist beliefs.
Clipping
OCR Quality
98%
Excellent
Full Text
A DILEMMA.
Many years ago a young Universalist clergyman started westward to attend a convention of his brethren. He took the precaution to carry a vial of cayenne in his pocket, to sprinkle his food with, as a preventive to fever and ague. The convention met, and at dinner a tall Hoosier observed the parson as he seasoned his meat, and addressed him thus.
"Stranger, I'll thank you for a leetle o' that 'ere red salt, for I'm kind o' cur'ous to try it."
The Hoosier took the proffered vial, and feeling himself proof against any quantity of raw whisky, thought that he could stand the "red salt" with impunity, and accordingly sprinkled a chunk of beef rather bountifully with it, and forthwith introduced it into his capacious mouth. It soon began to take effect. He shut his eyes and his features began to writhe, denoting a very inharmonious condition physically. Finally he could stand it no longer. He opened his mouth and screamed "fire!"
"Take a drink of cold water from the jug," said the parson.
"Will that put it out?" asked the martyr, suiting the action to the word.
In a short time the unfortunate man began to recover, and turning to the parson, his eyes still swimming in water, exclaimed:
"Stranger, you call yourself a 'Universalist, I believe?"
"I do," mildly answered the parson.
"Wall, I want to know if you think it is consistent with your belief to go about with hellfire in your breeches pocket?"
Many years ago a young Universalist clergyman started westward to attend a convention of his brethren. He took the precaution to carry a vial of cayenne in his pocket, to sprinkle his food with, as a preventive to fever and ague. The convention met, and at dinner a tall Hoosier observed the parson as he seasoned his meat, and addressed him thus.
"Stranger, I'll thank you for a leetle o' that 'ere red salt, for I'm kind o' cur'ous to try it."
The Hoosier took the proffered vial, and feeling himself proof against any quantity of raw whisky, thought that he could stand the "red salt" with impunity, and accordingly sprinkled a chunk of beef rather bountifully with it, and forthwith introduced it into his capacious mouth. It soon began to take effect. He shut his eyes and his features began to writhe, denoting a very inharmonious condition physically. Finally he could stand it no longer. He opened his mouth and screamed "fire!"
"Take a drink of cold water from the jug," said the parson.
"Will that put it out?" asked the martyr, suiting the action to the word.
In a short time the unfortunate man began to recover, and turning to the parson, his eyes still swimming in water, exclaimed:
"Stranger, you call yourself a 'Universalist, I believe?"
"I do," mildly answered the parson.
"Wall, I want to know if you think it is consistent with your belief to go about with hellfire in your breeches pocket?"
What sub-type of article is it?
Curiosity
What themes does it cover?
Misfortune
What keywords are associated?
Cayenne Pepper
Hoosier
Universalist
Red Salt
Hellfire Joke
What entities or persons were involved?
Young Universalist Clergyman
Tall Hoosier
Where did it happen?
At A Convention Westward
Story Details
Key Persons
Young Universalist Clergyman
Tall Hoosier
Location
At A Convention Westward
Event Date
Many Years Ago
Story Details
A clergyman carries cayenne pepper for health; a Hoosier mistakes it for red salt, eats it with beef, experiences burning pain, drinks water to recover, and jokes about the parson carrying hellfire contrary to Universalist beliefs.