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Poem
December 1, 1957
Ghost Town Gazette
Chitina, Alaska
What is this article about?
Humorous parody of 'Oh My Darling, Clementine' depicting a prehistoric woman named Clementine living near Chistochina, Alaska, who drowns, becomes a fossil, and is later reconstructed by Dr. Ivar, with modern descendants intermarrying.
Clipping
OCR Quality
95%
Excellent
Full Text
With all due apologies to Minnesota, we submit:
On a lake shore, near a glacier
In a Chistochina slime.
Dwelt a Pleistocene old timer
And his daughter, Clementine
Chorus
Oh my darling, oh my darling.
Chistochina Clementine.
Parts of you are lost forever,
Dreadful sorry, Clementine.
Oh, her teeth were big as tombstones
And her nose was platyrrhine.
Mighty spacious and prognathous.
Were the jaws of Clementine.
Drove she mammoths to the water
Every morning just at nine,
Stubbed her toe on the Nabesna,
Fell into the freezing brine.
Blubber lips among the cracked ice
Blowing steam and spouting slime,
But, alas she was no whaler cow,
So subsided Clementine.
B.P.R. men with a dozer in turn
Planing bumps left by the rime
Up they brought her, Asia's daughter.
Pleistocene Clementine.
Counting varves and sifting gravel,
Bones and beads, one at a time,
Dr. Ivar got her together.
Fossil flapper, Clementine.
And at Yuletide, near her moose-hide
Wigwam 'neath a snowy pine,
A smoky figure seems to go
Back and forth across the snow,
Just the GHOST of Clementine
Distant cousins, many dozens
Now find white men mighty fine
They maintain her, nor restrain her;
Dusky darlings, Clementine.
On a lake shore, near a glacier
In a Chistochina slime.
Dwelt a Pleistocene old timer
And his daughter, Clementine
Chorus
Oh my darling, oh my darling.
Chistochina Clementine.
Parts of you are lost forever,
Dreadful sorry, Clementine.
Oh, her teeth were big as tombstones
And her nose was platyrrhine.
Mighty spacious and prognathous.
Were the jaws of Clementine.
Drove she mammoths to the water
Every morning just at nine,
Stubbed her toe on the Nabesna,
Fell into the freezing brine.
Blubber lips among the cracked ice
Blowing steam and spouting slime,
But, alas she was no whaler cow,
So subsided Clementine.
B.P.R. men with a dozer in turn
Planing bumps left by the rime
Up they brought her, Asia's daughter.
Pleistocene Clementine.
Counting varves and sifting gravel,
Bones and beads, one at a time,
Dr. Ivar got her together.
Fossil flapper, Clementine.
And at Yuletide, near her moose-hide
Wigwam 'neath a snowy pine,
A smoky figure seems to go
Back and forth across the snow,
Just the GHOST of Clementine
Distant cousins, many dozens
Now find white men mighty fine
They maintain her, nor restrain her;
Dusky darlings, Clementine.
What sub-type of article is it?
Song
Ballad
Satire
What themes does it cover?
Satire Society
Science Progress
What keywords are associated?
Clementine Parody
Pleistocene
Fossil Discovery
Chistochina
Alaska Prehistory
Dr Ivar
Mammoths
Ghost Clementine
Poem Details
Subject
Parody Of Oh My Darling, Clementine, With Apologies To Minnesota
Form / Style
Rhymed Verses With Chorus, Parody Folk Song
Key Lines
On A Lake Shore, Near A Glacier
In A Chistochina Slime.
Dwelt A Pleistocene Old Timer
And His Daughter, Clementine
Chorus
Oh My Darling, Oh My Darling.
Chistochina Clementine.
Parts Of You Are Lost Forever,
Dreadful Sorry, Clementine.
Dr. Ivar Got Her Together.
Fossil Flapper, Clementine.
Just The Ghost Of Clementine
Dusky Darlings, Clementine.