The Daily News Of The Virgin Islands

'DEAR MISS AMALIE'

Letters to Charlotte and From Ghana Enliven File

By RONALD WILLIAMSON

Filed under "F" at the Virgin Islands Planning Board is a folder marked "Funny File."

A collection of correspondence that has broken up Michael Costello over the years, it is one of the more treasured possessions of the planning board.

"Filed under 'F' I once found a folder marked 'Things to Do'. I threw it out," Costello said.

"You can't have THAT sort of thing around the office."

The first item in the file is a letter from the Pratt Institute, Brooklyn, New York. It is addressed: "Miss Charlotte Amalie, Virgin Islands Planning Board, St. Thomas, Virgin Islands. Dear Miss Amalie: . ."

Another item carefully filed under 'F' is notable because of a pencilled comment written across correspondence announcing the opening of a New Orleans branch of a freight company. "It seems that these operators are opening another trucking trap in a town calling itself New Orleans. You can throw this away because I doubt if we will ever want to use (name deleted) except as a warning to the innocent."

The Virgin Islands Planning Board received mid-October 1960 issues of the St. Croix Avis on Jan. 9, 1961. The planning board secretary wrote,

"In order to expedite delivery it is suggested that you place future issues in a bottle addressed to the planning board and throw it into the sea off Long Reef. Great care should be taken to throw it CLEAR of the reef, as otherwise it could get caught in the surf and broken."

A letter from Roger Wyrick, St. Johns, Michigan reads,

"Would you be so kind to send me the Virgin Islands Planning Board. Thank you." It was not sent.

A form letter from "Translating Service" written in five languages got a reply from Costello in Gaelic. Lis King, head of the service, replied,

"We give up. What is it? Whatever it is you are hired."

It is not known how this letter from the Town and Country Planning Division, Accra, Ghana has affected Costello's social life, but it reads, "I hope you have been very happy at your new station. The only thing I suggest will make you happier there is to employ some of the West Indies girls - who may help - go with you - a jolly trip at your leisure hours. Thus good, you know!"

Costello, who does not want the taxpayer to assume that the planning board office is a riot of laughs, points out that there are other files in his office. Concerning $16 million of Virgin Islands projects. Not a chuckle in the lot.