The Lambertville Record

A GREAT BUT HARMLESS NUISANCE.

Next to the woman who says, "I told you so," whenever anything turns out just as you had calculated it wouldn't, and who to the best of your remembrance and belief, never told you anything of the sort—next to this creature, the greatest nuisance in the world is the amiable and well meaning bore who is everlastingly criticising his youngsters, and telling them what he did "when he was their age." To judge by his account he was the rival of Solomon in sagacity, and never in his life did anything but that which was the wisest and most profitable thing to be done under the circumstances; in spite of which fact he seldom seems to have "got on" well in the world, and usually appears to have had fairly hard luck on the whole. A well known young man in this city has had the fortune to possess a mentor of the quality above described, and much has he suffered from his reminiscences of the days of his youth. The other day, however, when objection had been raised to some action of the young man's and the philosopher essayed to point an instructive lesson by beginning an oration with the familiar words, "When I was your age," the long suffering youth arose and said:— "Look here, now! When you were my age did you ever have a troublesome old man come in and lecture you about what he used to do? Yes, of course you did. And did you ever catch him by the collar—so—and bang him up against the wall—thus—and drag him down stairs—like this—and pitch him into the street—after this fashion—when you were his age?" "No," said the bore, as he picked himself up and rubbed his elbow, ".I never did." "Well," said the aroused and puffing victim, "there's where you made one mistake in your life, anyhow," and he went up stairs to resume his labors in peace.—Boston Journal.