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Literary November 30, 1936

The Key West Citizen

Key West, Monroe County, Florida

What is this article about?

In this chapter of a mystery novel, detective Mahony argues with Ruth about an actress Elsa's interference in a kidnapping plot. Misunderstandings lead to a romantic confession, laughter, and a decision to marry, parodying film tropes.

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The Wrong Murderer
By HUGH CLEVELY

Chapter 49

"If You Insist..."

FRANKLY, I shouldn't care a hoot if she thought I'd massacred battalions of her uncles." Terence stated. "What the devil did she want to come butting in for tonight? There was no need for her to be there at all. She'd arranged with Lawson to have me kidnapped, and instead of letting him get on with the job, as any sensible person would have done, she had to come barging in herself, turning the whole business into the last act of a film play complete with fair-haired heroine registering lots of emotion. That's the trouble with actresses: they must have scenes."

There was a pause. Then,

"I think you are an utter pig," said Ruth in a tone of deep conviction.

"What!" exclaimed Mahony.

He looked at her and saw, to his surprise, that she was on the point of tears.

"What's the matter, Ruth?" he asked in a concerned voice.

"I think you're beastly," answered Ruth, a little indistinctly.

"But... why? For heaven's sake, why?" demanded Mahony hopelessly. "What have I done?"

There was another pause, while Ruth collected her dignity.

"I'm sorry I came barging in, turning all your nice, neat little arrangements into a film play," she said in a cold, haughty voice. "However, you won't be bothered with me any more."

"Stop it, Ruth," said Mahony rudely. "Stop being all temperamental."

"I'm not being all temperamental," answered Ruth angrily. "You said that Elsa came barging in, turning everything into a film play, and as I came barging in, too, I must have done the same. Do you think I couldn't see what you meant?"

"I didn't mean anything of the sort," protested Mahony. "You well, you're different. You didn't barge in—that is, not really barge in. I mean, we've been sort of partners."

He found his meaning very difficult to explain.

"You are different," he went on. "You just barged in because you wanted to, so to speak; you weren't Ruth Fraser, the girl heroine avenging her uncle's death by vamping the deceitful villain, or Ruth Fraser righting a wrong by having the misunderstood but well-intentioned young man kidnapped for his own good and insisting on being present when the kidnapping took place because the heroine must be in the big scene... I hate all this drama. It gives me a pain in the neck."

"Nonsense," replied Ruth. "You've been behaving like the perfect little film hero ever since I met you. And you're annoyed with Elsa because you're in love with her and she made a fool of you."

MAHONY was stung by this monstrous accusation.

"Don't talk so damned wet," he said irritably. "I'm not in love with her. You know perfectly well I'm not in love with her. You know I'm in love with you."

Ruth smiled slightly. Her expression was a little smug, like that of a kitten which has just put away a saucer of delicious cream.

"Well, you needn't shout," she said primly.

She looked sideways at him out of the corners of her eyes. He looked at her at the same moment. Suddenly they both burst out laughing.

Mahony took her hand and drew her towards him.

"Let's get married and clear out somewhere as soon as we can," he said.

She shook her head.

"No," she said. "I couldn't do that. If I married you now, after all that's happened, it would be too much like the ending of a film story."

"Stop it, you little hell-cat," said Mahony, and drew her closer and kissed her. She kissed him too.

"Oh, well," she murmured. "If you insist..."

(Copyright, 1936, Hugh Cleveley)

THE END

What sub-type of article is it?

Prose Fiction Dialogue

What themes does it cover?

Love Romance

What keywords are associated?

Romance Mystery Kidnapping Actress Film Parody Confession

What entities or persons were involved?

By Hugh Clevely

Literary Details

Title

Chapter 49 "If You Insist..."

Author

By Hugh Clevely

Key Lines

"I'm Not In Love With Her. You Know Perfectly Well I'm Not In Love With Her. You Know I'm In Love With You." "Let's Get Married And Clear Out Somewhere As Soon As We Can," He Said. "Oh, Well," She Murmured. "If You Insist..."

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