Thank you for visiting SNEWPapers!
Sign up free
Literary
September 7, 1924
The Milwaukee Leader
Milwaukee, Milwaukee County, Wisconsin
What is this article about?
Humorous poem by I. Sellem about visiting a friend whose phonograph malfunctions while playing Caruso and Gluck records, leading to frustration and discovering a repair ad in the classifieds, with jokes about ads for a 'Good Girl' and lost dogs.
Clipping
OCR Quality
95%
Excellent
Full Text
On the Road to Classified
WITH I. SELLEM
I visited my friend Bill Blend,
And herein lies the laugh,
He always had invited me
To hear his phonograph.
He pulled out a "Caruso"
To play his fav'rite song;
But something wasn't
working right-
Caruso sounded wrong.
It started out "O sole mi"
Caruso's peerless tones,
But turned into a "chunk-
kerplunk"
And then the worst of
moans.
"This
record
must
be
scratched," he said,
And so he tried another;
But then the motor did its
worst,
The voice of
Gluck
to
smother.
The way Bill cussed that
phonograph
It wasn't hardly fair;
He might have known the
best machine,
Would Sometime
need
repair.
Tonight in Classified I see
A little paragraph,
Inserted by a man who'll.
cure
Your sickly phonograph.
The general is now
advertising for a "Good
Girl." Some generals
aren't so particular but
this is General House-
work.
A hound and a Ger-
man police dog are lost.
They must have been
r e a ding Sherlock
Holmes detective stor-
ies.
WITH I. SELLEM
I visited my friend Bill Blend,
And herein lies the laugh,
He always had invited me
To hear his phonograph.
He pulled out a "Caruso"
To play his fav'rite song;
But something wasn't
working right-
Caruso sounded wrong.
It started out "O sole mi"
Caruso's peerless tones,
But turned into a "chunk-
kerplunk"
And then the worst of
moans.
"This
record
must
be
scratched," he said,
And so he tried another;
But then the motor did its
worst,
The voice of
Gluck
to
smother.
The way Bill cussed that
phonograph
It wasn't hardly fair;
He might have known the
best machine,
Would Sometime
need
repair.
Tonight in Classified I see
A little paragraph,
Inserted by a man who'll.
cure
Your sickly phonograph.
The general is now
advertising for a "Good
Girl." Some generals
aren't so particular but
this is General House-
work.
A hound and a Ger-
man police dog are lost.
They must have been
r e a ding Sherlock
Holmes detective stor-
ies.
What sub-type of article is it?
Poem
Satire
What themes does it cover?
Commerce Trade
Social Manners
What keywords are associated?
Phonograph
Classified Ads
Caruso
Gluck
Lost Dogs
Housework
Humor
What entities or persons were involved?
With I. Sellem
Literary Details
Title
On The Road To Classified
Author
With I. Sellem
Key Lines
It Started Out "O Sole Mi"
Caruso's Peerless Tones,
But Turned Into A "Chunk
Kerplunk"
And Then The Worst Of
Moans.
The Way Bill Cussed That
Phonograph
It Wasn't Hardly Fair;
Tonight In Classified I See
A Little Paragraph,
Inserted By A Man Who'll.
Cure
Your Sickly Phonograph.
The General Is Now
Advertising For A "Good
Girl." Some Generals
Aren't So Particular But
This Is General House
Work.
A Hound And A Ger
Man Police Dog Are Lost.
They Must Have Been
R E A Ding Sherlock
Holmes Detective Stor
Ies.