Jessen's Weekly

Caught In The Sluicebox
(Continued from Page 1)

BIG TOWN NEWS: The snow melting machine that Anchorage has worked so good this winter they is gonna have to buy a snow maker to go with it so they will have some snow for next year's fur Rendezvous and Dog races.

See where the State Chamber of Commerce is worried about high priced labor, which reminds ole buck of that famous sayin about "people what lives in glass houses shouldn't throw stones."

Shore wuz nice back in the "good ole days" before they had labor unions up here. Why prices used to be dirt cheap . . . (providing you mixed a little gold dust in with the dirt, that is.)

THE WINNER: Looks like the president of the Methodist college in Anchorage has won the big fight with right-winger Milton Lowry what said he had been treated poorly at the school. The news reporters down there held a little investigation an has cleared the college an said they was right neighborly to the right-winger.

IT PASSED: Yep, the big ole democrat slush fund to help out starvin people (so as to git there votes, of course) has went an passed the Senate. Funny part of it is, a couple of Republicans even voted for it. (Guess some of the Republican voters is in danger of starvin too.)

DID YOU EVER WONDER?: With all the fightin over open end contracts at the city council meets, if it is really the City manager's "open end" contract at least one councilmember is seekin to terminate?

Speakin about them City Council meets, they is gittin purty popular. In fact, the front row seats is jist about all gone these days. (There is still room in the bleachers yet.)

THE LEGISLATURE: There is so much more action goin on in the Senate this session of the Legislature that you gits the peculiar feelin sometimes that we has a unicameral legislature an don't know it.

PASSIN PARADE: North Pole resident Lew Dischner made a whirlwind tour to Fairbanks this past weekend an kept talkin about a big "radar" project he is workin on . . . 1,000 school teachers will visit Fairbanks durin the Winter Carnival (for there state convention) . . .

BUCKWHEAT SPECIAL:
This week we takes a brief flight to the moon as we peers into the future in honor of Century 21 . . . This is what we sees . . . (written in news story style) . . .

WASHINGTON, D.C. - Senator Slackbottom of Alabama said today he is in favor of Statehood for the Moon, but not now. The Senator would like to hav the Moon men take another referendum on whether they is in favor of it or not.

ANCHORAGE - Robert Atwater today editorially endorsed moving the capitol of Alaska from Juneau to the Moon. Atwater said the move would make the capitol "more accessible to the people of Western Alaska".

NEW YORK - Professor Tusktower of Columbia today lamented the fact that there is no more new frontiers, now that the moon is being settled. Referring to the moon as America's last frontier, he said the American people would be gittin soft "purty soon".

MOONVILLE - C. W. Snodden, publisher of the Daily Moon-Miner, said the high cost of labor is killin economic development of the Moon. He also spoke agin the bill to ban bringing strikebreakers to the moon from earth.

JESSEN'S WEEKLY