The Enquirer

NEW ADMINISTRATION,
[From the Times.]

The following was handed about in some fashionable circles as the outline of a new administration; to comprise, according to the notions lately supported by some Members in both Houses of Parliament, all the talents, virtue, and experience of the nation.

Lord Grenville to be Commander in Chief both by land and sea: Master-general of blood-hounds, to conduct the march to Paris, which is to end in nailing the ears of the First Consul on the gates of the Thuilleries.

Earl Stanhope to be Lord High Admiral-in action to command the sub-aqueous division.

Earl Fitzwilliam to be Archbishop of Armagh, with the liberty of celebrating mass on all proper occasions in his private chapel.

The Earl of Carlisle to be Ambassador extraordinary to the United States of America. N.B. Red-heeled shoes not to make any part of the diplomatic apparatus, nor the name Joseph Read to be mentioned in any of the dispatches.

As his Lordship is of a liberal spirit, it is understood that on this occasion he serves his country from pure patriotism, and without any emolument.

Colonel Patten to be Public Orator, with a pension on the Irish establishment. Though this will be a new office, yet it is generally understood that it will be a sinecure.

Mr. Windham to be Master of the Revels, & Director of the Royal Sports, in which bull-baiting and bruising are by no means to be omitted. As this employment, however, will not be sufficient to occupy the whole of this gentleman's extensive talents, it is supposed that the office of Comptroller of the King's Kitchen is to be added to it, with a distinct salary to arise out of the saving of cheese-parings and candle-ends.

Mr. Horne Tooke (for this plan is to include the distinguished names among all parties) to be Lord High Chancellor: to form a new plan of parliamentary reform, in which the Bishops are to be deprived of their seats in the House of Lords, but to be eligible to seats for all the rotten boroughs, and to have the liberty of wearing bag-wigs and coloured clothes when they attend their parliamentary duty.

The other offices to be disposed of (comme il faut) to the different branches and dependants of the House of Grenville, who are themselves exclusively to form the Cabinet Council.