Missouri Valley Times

New Senator Who Has the Right to Crow.

Walter Harrison in the Des Moines Register and Leader:

"There was a great flapping of pinions on the part of the democratic roosters when the election returns put the minority in the majority at Washington a few months ago.

The old cock had been standing the gaff for so long he had a right to crow.

"Here is a new senator, who has a right to crow, being a democrat from the word go.-- Edward Linas Crow, Linas for short, you know. The legislature should pass a bill providing capital punishment for an alleged jokesmith who will make puns on a man's name. Since there is no law, I take the liberty, knowing it won't make Linas pou', as he said he has heard it so often it has lost its sting.

"A naive farmer, he seems, sitting there in the senate chamber, one leg crossed over the other, rather idly watching an executive committee clerk trying to manicure her nails with a two-foot rule, when he should be listening to the report of the committee on suppression of telephone girls who chew gum out loud.

"Crow's naivete is all assumed. He is wise to the political game, from soup to nuts, and any time he tries to make out he isn't- rub your eyes and tell him to quit kidding you.

"He owns several farms in Monona county, has a few stockers and feeders from which he cuts out a bunch of fat ones every time he needs a piece of spending money, runs an elevator or two and upholds the democratic party in the Crawford-Harrison-Monona district. So he is in the state senate for the fun he gets out of it. Not that he goes down Walnut street singing "Yipp-I-addy, Hooray; Hooray!" as absorbed alcohol, nothing slanderous is alleged -who ever heard of a state senator being accused of "drinking liquor, anyway? Perish the tho't.

But as I was about to say when the train took the siding he has a good time out of his being a senator. Looks after his constituents, certainly yes, but doesn't think the weight of the whole world is on his senatorial shoulders. Winks and wrinkles his face and haw-haws just as loud as he pleases he don't care if the governor hears him.

"E L Crow, of Mapleton, Ia., is one of the most artistic cusses in the civilized Kingdom. If he made a speech in the senate in the same manner he would call you for stealing his votes, his cane would go rattling and resounding down the halls of time. He don't use any "primrose path to the everlasting bonfire" lines. He talks it out straight in short and ugly words and can go fifteen minutes without repeating himself. His vocabulary is stupendous and stupefying. But he is well trained and doesn't break loose often.

"Carl Kuehnle, of Denison and let his beard get about a week long before he sallied out to see the farmers.

"Kuehnle was confident of election, a slick dresser, and a commanding orator, his campaign struck better with the highbrows. He was pretty well satisfied he was on the road to the governorship with state senate the first rung in the ladder but the rung broke. Crow's decisive victory over Kuehnle was one of the surprises in northwestern Iowa.

"In the book they say I went to college, but I didn't" said Mr Crow. "never went to anything but to a country school in my life, except one term. Don't want to sail under false colors.

"Senator Crow was mayor of Mapleton for several years, the chairman of the Monona county committee, and has been a delegate to state and national conventions.

"Sometime the people up in the Eleventh District are going to decide Congressman Hubbard should not serve all of his life in Congress, and it will be men like Crow who will get the bacon."