The Cambria Freeman

MISNOMERED M.

A sojourn in New England has
shown me the fact
That female nomenclature there
Is at variance with the claim
To all the gifts and
(Though I met a series with
names.

Faith Johnson was the first I met; I thought
her name so sweet,
And she was very beautiful, accomplished, and
so neat;
But Faith proved faithless unto me—she was a
gay deceiver—
And in religious matters, too, she was an unbe-
liever.

I found Hope Smith a darling girl and wonderfully wise,
And yet I could not understand her hopeless
kind of sighs,
For she was given to despond, and said, when
e'er I chaffed her,
She had no hope of happiness in this world or
hereafter.

Then later, Charity De Kalb ensnared my youth-
ful heart
She had a graceful figure and a manner very
smart,
Yet in her disposition envy was the reigning
feature,
And Charity turned out to be a sordid, selfish
creature.

The next I met was Prudence Jones, a girl of
eighteen springs.
But she was gay and giddy and too fond of costly things;
Extravagance in dress no doubt was her beset-
ting sin;
God help the man whose cruel luck that damsel
dear shall win!

I had an introduction to Humility Burdette,
Whose vanity and self-conceit I never can forget:
Distinguished o'er her sisters for insufferable
pride,
Humility was just the gift which she had been
denied.

I then made the acquaintance of Peace Robin-
son, of Maine.
A fiery girl whose temper mortal never could
restrain.
She used to get quite violent and tear her hair
and mine.
So marriage with that maiden I of course had
to decline.

The next of the New England girls I met was
Patience Brown,
The daughter of a banker in a Massachusetts
town;
Her irritable nature, and the way she'd fume
and fret,
Induced me to bid her good-bye without the
least regret.

The last I met was Wealthy Green, and I was
rather rash,
For I proposed and married her, depending on
her cash.
But after we were wedded I had reason to re-
-pent,
For I very soon discovered Wealthy wasn't
worth a cent.

—John S. Grey, in Texas Siftings.