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Letter to Editor
June 1, 1739
The Virginia Gazette
Richmond, Williamsburg, Richmond County, Virginia
What is this article about?
A reader A.Z. submits an old letter for publication in the Gazette: a humorous epistle from a Country Parson in Yorkshire to Quaker watchmaker Mark Hodgson in York, complaining about a faulty watch using religious and moral metaphors for its 'lying' and need for spiritual correction.
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Full Text
Mr. Parks,
In looking over some old Papers, I chanc'd to meet with the following Letter; which, if you will please to insert in your next Gazette, you will oblige your constant Reader,
A. Z.
A Letter from a Country Parson in Yorkshire to Mark Hodgson, a Quaker, Watch-maker, in the City of York.
Friend Mark,
Desired Francis Hillyard, that lives at the Sign of the dead Letter, (and gains much by trading that Way) to bring an I erroneous Watch to receive thy friendly Corrections and Reproofs. She has been a long Time guilty of Lying, and would seldom speak the Truth: By her Lying, I have often been deceived, and led into Mistakes.
She has been twice at thy School for Amendments; but as yet hath profited little under thy Hands: I fear her Principles are not good; for she is so very apt to lie, I dare not confide in her outward Indications. I wish thou wouldst cast this Spirit of Untruth out of her, and make her go in the Way of Honesty and Verity, and instruct her to point at that which is Right. Plainly, Friend Mark, I tell thee, I confide much in thy outward Skill; and I hope thy Integrity is equal to it. If thee Defects proceed from any Faults in her inward Man, (I mean the Springs,) or from any other Cause, I must desire thee to rectify those evil Principles which thou knowest will seldom produce good Fruit. I fear there is some latent Root or Evil in her, otherwise she would not deceive both thee and me. Thou tellest me, that thou hast filed her; alas, Friend, the old Defilement of Lying continues! Thou sayest, thou hast set the Carrick Wheel right; yet the whole Machine goes wrong. Thou tellest me, thou hast cleaned her; and yet her filthy Tricks remains. Thou sayest, thou hast taken out the Bruises; but still the old Sores continue: That thou hast turn'd the Tops of her Teeth; and yet she remains unconverted from her Faults. Thus, in a Sense literal, O Watchman, thou watchest in vain!
Thou tellest me, thou must have the Fifth Part of a Pound Sterling (so the World calls it) for thy Pains. I own thou art worthy of a Recompence, when thy Labours profit me. From Baltico in Helvetia, the Residence of my fleshy Tabernacle; where thou mayest be welcome to such Creatures as I keep.
In looking over some old Papers, I chanc'd to meet with the following Letter; which, if you will please to insert in your next Gazette, you will oblige your constant Reader,
A. Z.
A Letter from a Country Parson in Yorkshire to Mark Hodgson, a Quaker, Watch-maker, in the City of York.
Friend Mark,
Desired Francis Hillyard, that lives at the Sign of the dead Letter, (and gains much by trading that Way) to bring an I erroneous Watch to receive thy friendly Corrections and Reproofs. She has been a long Time guilty of Lying, and would seldom speak the Truth: By her Lying, I have often been deceived, and led into Mistakes.
She has been twice at thy School for Amendments; but as yet hath profited little under thy Hands: I fear her Principles are not good; for she is so very apt to lie, I dare not confide in her outward Indications. I wish thou wouldst cast this Spirit of Untruth out of her, and make her go in the Way of Honesty and Verity, and instruct her to point at that which is Right. Plainly, Friend Mark, I tell thee, I confide much in thy outward Skill; and I hope thy Integrity is equal to it. If thee Defects proceed from any Faults in her inward Man, (I mean the Springs,) or from any other Cause, I must desire thee to rectify those evil Principles which thou knowest will seldom produce good Fruit. I fear there is some latent Root or Evil in her, otherwise she would not deceive both thee and me. Thou tellest me, that thou hast filed her; alas, Friend, the old Defilement of Lying continues! Thou sayest, thou hast set the Carrick Wheel right; yet the whole Machine goes wrong. Thou tellest me, thou hast cleaned her; and yet her filthy Tricks remains. Thou sayest, thou hast taken out the Bruises; but still the old Sores continue: That thou hast turn'd the Tops of her Teeth; and yet she remains unconverted from her Faults. Thus, in a Sense literal, O Watchman, thou watchest in vain!
Thou tellest me, thou must have the Fifth Part of a Pound Sterling (so the World calls it) for thy Pains. I own thou art worthy of a Recompence, when thy Labours profit me. From Baltico in Helvetia, the Residence of my fleshy Tabernacle; where thou mayest be welcome to such Creatures as I keep.
What sub-type of article is it?
Satirical
Comedic
Religious
What themes does it cover?
Religion
Morality
What keywords are associated?
Quaker Watchmaker
Lying Watch
Religious Satire
Moral Correction
Yorkshire Parson
Watch Repair
Honesty Verity
What entities or persons were involved?
A. Z.
Mr. Parks
Letter to Editor Details
Author
A. Z.
Recipient
Mr. Parks
Main Argument
requests insertion of an enclosed old letter in the next gazette, which humorously uses religious language to complain about a faulty watch repaired by a quaker.
Notable Details
Encloses A Satirical Letter From A Country Parson To Mark Hodgson
Uses Quaker 'Thee' And 'Thou' Speech
Metaphors Of Spiritual Correction For Watch Repair Issues
Signed From Baltico In Helvetia