The New Hampshire Gazette And General Advertiser

The Lion, the Mastives, and other Beasts.

A FABLE.

In former days—no matter when—
Four-footed beasts resembled men;
Partook of human speech and cares,
And managed mighty state affairs.

'Twas then a horrid war arose
Betwixt a Lion and his foes.
This Lion was a Lion stout.
And put the fiercest herds to rout.
And kept the quadruped nations under.
And slew like death, and roared like thunder.
Establishing his royal will.
By right divine to govern ill:
Demolished equity and law,
And measured justice by his paw!

Aroused at last, the beasts convene
In full assembly on the green—
For common weal, and common fear,
United them both far and near.
Why should we lavish precious time
To number all their names in rhyme.
Or tell the vote to bring in pat
The Rabbit, Monkey, Mouse or Cat
Suffice it all the beasts were there
And voted Reynard in the chair.
The moderator orders silence,

In accent to be heard a mile thence
And then each quadrupedal yeoman
Spoke like a veteran Greek or Roman—
Determining to bid defiance,
And die, or kill despotic Lions.
And one and all united roar,
"We'll never serve this tyrant more;"
Then, holding up the hoof or paw,
They make it a perpetual law.

Scarce had the chairman signed the same,
When down upon them Leo came—
And like a whirlwind swept along,
And rent the boldest of the throng,
The nimble Hare, the subtle Fox,
The Kid, the Heifer, and the Ox,
The Monkey, Bear, and Mole, and Pig,
And many a cloven footed Whig!
At once forsook the promised strife.
Took to their heels, and fled for life.

But in this crisis of their fate,
When terror shook them small and great—
The Mastives rose—a generous band,
Resolved to make one gallant stand
Oppose this rampant Lion's might,
And check his course—or die in fight.
At once they beard him tooth to face:
And carnage covers all the place.
Their reeking lives the soil detains—a
They fall by thousands on the plains—
Nor yet from well-fought field withdraw
"Till they have torn away his paw:
And now the fugitives collect,
And show the victors high respect.

To recompense their martial pranks,
Behold a generous vote of—thanks;
With promise, if they'll fight again,
Of nourishment from common den:
And if they break the Lion's head,
To them, and to their offspring, bread—
And also should their lives be lost,
A funeral at the public cost—
Nay, and besides what's due each beast.
Full five days extra food at least.

This solemn contract sealed and signed,
Well executed to their mind—
The assembled brutes erect their jaws.
And yield the mastives fresh applause—
Hail them defenders of their freedom.
And swear to love, and bless, and feed 'em
Fawn on them with the fondest greeting,
And then adjourn the present meeting;
While each retires to tranquil life,
To rear his young, and kiss his wife.

Meanwhile the mastives in the front,
Of bloody battles bear the brunt.
And now the enemy attacking.
They get perhaps a thorough whacking
Anon, by stratagem or chance,
They claw his ears—and make him dance
Seven live long days—as many nights,
Are crimsoned thus by horrid fights,
When Jove—or destiny—or fate,
Impelled each dog on Leo's pate—and
Full at him the whole cohort runs,
He roars—they bite—like ours of guns,
And lacerate his monstrous jaw,
And tear away the other paw

This caused the rage of war to cease,
And gave the frighted forest peace.
But who can now the joy display,
Of such a happy holiday!
Again quadruped crowds convene.
And prance throughout the sylvan scene—
Rejoice, exult in raptures rude.
And festive sounds of gratitude.

With pealing shouts the woodlands ring.
Each Mastiff's glory—how they sing!
"This nobly fought—that gloriously died,
"And t'other thrashed the Lion's hide.—"
"What happy trophies shall they raise,
""Perpetuating patriot praise!"

And now, released from martial strife
The Mastiffs seek a peaceful life.
Worn out in battles, toils and cares,
In ear-seamed coats—and silver hairs.
They humbly ask their promised food,
The price of safety—bought with blood,
But envy, av'rice, reared their crest,
And brutal nature stood confessed.

The Fox begins.."I'd sooner shoot ye
""Than pay you for a public duty;
""No honest brute would dare to mention
"That vile commutation—the five days pension!
""In this new commonwealth of reason
""Its very name amounts to treason?
""'Tis true in war we found you stout,
""Then who so fit to fight it out?
""All animals of sense and science
"Make Dogs, like you, contend with Lions?
""Hence to promote it—we, the wise,
""Agreed to coin politic lies
"In which all nations justify us.
""Turk, Christian, Jew—profane and pious.

""Besides, the contract has a flaw—
""Some quadrupeds ne'er signed the law
"And silence does not give consent
"In beastly courts of Parliament.—
""Be sure, we kept this matter quiet
""Till you suppressed the bloody riot—
""Yet—ergo—since all never signed,
""The five days bargain cannot bind

"Bravo!" exclaims the Mole,
(Just creeping from his dirty hole)
A contract, except each consents,
"Is null and void—to all intents—
""This promise is defunct no less—
""We made it under war's duress:
""And all such covenants should cease
"The moment we have gotten peace,
""Hence for my life I cannot see
""Why Dogs are favoured more than we.

""Nor I" (replies the bearded Goat)
""I hate a Mastiff" (grunts the Boar.)
The Monkey grins—"what, give my nuts
""To cram a ragged Mastiff's guts!"
The little Squirrel cocks his tail.
And "trusts their whole demand will fail.".
Even Grasshoppers erect their backs.
And, shrugging, "hate the impost tax."
And last a Flea, in patriot pet,
"Would rather bleed—than pay the debt!"

Thus are the war-worn Mastives treated,
Cajol'd, and vilified, and cheated!

MORAL.
Let all whom no such fable suits.
Detest ungrateful, cheating brutes!