Passaic City Record

Rough on Stokes.

Story of a Dream That Proved No Compliment to the Benedict.

Peter Stokes, who has been married only two weeks, has left his wife, says Tit-Bits. Stokes is a little man, and his wife weighs 240 pounds, and was the relict of the late Seth Thompson. About ten days after marriage Stokes was surprised, on waking in the morning, to find his better half sitting up in bed and crying as if her heart would break. Astonished, he asked the cause of her sorrow, but, receiving no reply, he began to surmise that there must be some secret on her mind which she withheld from him, and which was the cause of her anguish; so he remarked to Mrs. S. that as they were married she ought to tell him the cause of her grief, so that, if possible, he might lessen it. After considerable coaxing, he elicited the following from her: "Last night I dreamed I was single, and as I walked through a well lighted street I came to a shop where a sign in front advertised husbands for sale. Thinking it curious I entered, and ranged along the wall on either side were men with prices affixed to them-such beautiful men-some for one thousand pounds, some five hundred, and so on to one hundred and fifty; and, as I had not that amount, I could not purchase." Thinking to console her, Stokes placed his arm lovingly around her, and asked, "And did you see any men like me there?" "Oh, yes," she replied, "lots like you they were tied up in bunches like asparagus, and sold for ten shillings per bunch." Stokes got up, and went to ask his lawyer if he had sufficient ground for a divorce.