Kentucky Gazette

MISCELLANY.
FROM THE COMMERCIAL ADVERTISER.
SARATOGA SPRINGS AUG. 25.
No incident of importance has transpired here for some time past, until Thursday of last week, at 4 o'clock, P. M. when an affair of honor took place, not altogether unworthy of notice. The particulars of this fashionable rencontre we have collected for the special information and benefit of those gallant bloods who delight to settle the most trifling disputes by popping each other with pistols, in a gentlemanly way. They were substantially thus:

Some difficulty arose between the Cooks of Congress and Union Halls, both of whom are people of colour. The former, who claims to have acquired his skill in France, had made some insinuations calculated to injure the professional character of the latter. Indeed, he directly called in question his skill, dexterity and genius, in the sublime art and mystery of extracting, creating and combining flavours, so as in all instances to render his dishes pleasing to the palate, and agreeable to the stomach. Cuffee, who made no professions of skill in transforming frogs into savoury meat, insisted, nevertheless, that he was an accomplished professor in all the necessary and substantial branches of his business, such as roasting and toasting, boiling and frying, &c. and after a consultation with his friends, determined to have satisfaction. The communications at first were oral, and it was determined by the parties to have a few set-to's after the manner of Molineaux and Cribb. Saratoga, however, being a fashionable place of resort, their friends concluded that a correspondence in the true style of modern chivalry, should take place, preparatory to having the matter settled in an honourable way. The following is supposed to have been the correspondence:

UNION HALL, ober de way 20 Awgust.
Mr. Tonson Cuffee
What de debble hab you sirkulate sich a report ub mee for? Do you tink Toney hab not de spirits to resent any thig like de insult? I'll hab you kno de kontrary den. You brak yellow raskull, to say that I hab not skill to maik a good prumb pudding, nor to roast de goose and de gander too, after hearing Missa Phillis read troo and troo de Gorman dizer's Almanack, and de Cook's Oracle which vot stole from de maitre d'hotel in France or Paris, (I forget which.) I'd hab you to kno dat I must eat your words up, or meet me like a gentleman.
Yours if you take 'um back
TONEY

This laconic and spirited letter produced the following reply, which shews that Monsieur Tonson, or Cuffee, had no idea of shrinking from his antagonist's, as Sir Francis Burdett did from Mr. Canning on a late occasion.

HOTEL DE KONGKIS, AUG. 20.
Begar! Toney, you must be in a rage you swell up like a toad fish, or a puff'd turkey so! How it makes me laaf! You tink I, who am a tore gh bred artist, and who had been loi von master up de grand art up cooking, from dressing Le Veau, Le Cochon, ard Le Oie, and all de soufilime dis'es vor de Ditches de Angouleme, should come de lebel wid an ignorant dabbler de tailen, and meet him on de Champ de Dawis. Ven you har stucy uc Almanack may look in my face. But you talk oi de fight. Begar! you'd much better like to smell de ragout dan de dem gun powdcr. You dare fight no more den ven you insulted Jacky Snowball, by peeping into de window, ven he vas charming de ben and lubly Missa Dinah, with de pewty fool song ub
How brest was de hour,
Ven to Missa Dinah's bower,
Mussa Kuffe wit his true hart come.
The moon hid her light,
Dinah's eyes shone so bright,--
I cant remember any more, but it was something about two moons for one;-- and after all you skulk'd like a puppy. You kno nothing ub de grande science, sabe to roast von petit Cochon, or boil a poratoe. And as to de grand fight, a spit looks better in your greasy hands dan pistol-gun. How ber, if you wish to try your skill, here's a yoo.
CUFFEE forever.

This epistle, as it may well be imagined, was not calculated to allay the irritated feelings of one whose honor was so tender, and so dear to him, and produced the following note, which brought matters to a crisis.

O you yellow brack scoundrel, to put insult on de top ub injury. I wished to hab no quarrel, but to settle it amikably. You hab fixed a brack spot on my charactr which nothing but brood kan wash away You shall see weather I kan handie de spit or de pistol better - O if I could but hab you on de spit, I'd show you how to turn you I'd roast you and baste you too Mist r Sambo, who carries dis will make all prupper arrangemen's. Take care ub yourself. You'i find my courage up to le sticking plase. Missa Chloe says you had de imbudence to gif as a toast to'ther day, 'De African fair seck ;-- Dey look more pewtyfool in de dark.' Not your's,
TONEY.

A meeting was now unavoidable. The seconds were the head musician of the Congress Hall and Pavilion Band, and a gentleman who goes by the name of the Prince of darkness—also a musician. They still attempted to dissuade the parties from the bloody trial ; but finding their efforts unavailing—that all harmony between the parties was at an end—they determined to have some music in the affair, if nothing more. The ground selected for the tidre i, was that on which the cannon was planted during the celebration of the 4th of July, 1820, immediatly east of Congress Spring: and they were to fire at the distance of six paces. One of the parties having solemnly made his will, they all repaired to the awful spot, and the two immediately concerned walked with a firm step until they had nearly reached the battle-ground. A slight tremour was then perceived, which increased while the seconds were depositing the winged messengers of death in the barrels of the pistols (We ought here to mention that by this time the affair had got wind. and the battle ground was soon surrounded by hundreds of anxious spectators.) The pistols were placed in the hands of the combatants, and they took their distance. Cuffee looked as pale as the sun when totally eclipsed and the gravy rolled from the sable cheeks of Toney. The seconds were to count ten, which last number was to be the signal for firing. They began—'one, two, three, four, five, six,'—here, unfortunately, Toney made a mistake, and fired. Cuffee, however, held to his feet, and some altercation ensued. He contended that he must not lose his fire; but was overruled, and Toney's piece was re-loaded. His nerves grew stronger under the invigorating influence of gun powder smoke, and the heroes exchanged three shots—the last of which were exactly together. Having thus amply tested their courage, the knights of the cat gut interfered, and after much persuasion, Toney, though with great reluctance, concluded that his shattered reputation was repaired. The parties then shook hands grinning most complacently upon each other displaying a fine stock of ivory, and left the ground in triumph. Before dismissing this important affair, it is proper to remark, that the seconds having more care for the lives of their employers than they had themselves, had prudently, (though unknown to the principals,) charged the pistols with dough instead of lead—the ammunition in general use among pastry cooks. The affair, so threatening in its aspect, has thus happily terminated; and the only evil that has accrued to the parties, is, that by a law of the state they are disfranchised, and rendered incapable of holding any office of honor or trust—unless the approaching Convention in their wisdom and power, should think it expedient to make provision for cases of such extreme delicacy.