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Literary
March 13, 1874
The Jasper Weekly Courier
Jasper, Dubois County, Indiana
What is this article about?
A humorous fable in verse about two spiders entering a church. One is repeatedly swept away from the altar and pulpit by the sexton, while the other prospers by spinning its web over the contribution box, implying a satirical nod to church donations.
OCR Quality
95%
Excellent
Full Text
MISCELLANY.
The Church Spider
Two spiders, upon a living bent,
Entered the meeting-house one day,
And hopefully were heard to say
"Here we shall have at least fair play,
With nothing to prevent."
Each chose his place and went to work;
The light webs grew apace;
One on the altar spun his thread,
But shortly came the sexton dread,
And swept him off, and so, half dead,
He sought another place.
"I'll try the pulpit next," said he,
"There surely is a prize;
The desk appears so neat and clean,
I'm sure no spider there has been;
Besides, how often have I seen
The pastor brushing flies."
He tried the pulpit, but alas!
His hopes proved visionary;
With dusting brush the sexton came,
And spoiled his geometric game,
Nor gave him time or space to claim
The right of sanctuary.
At length, half starved, and weak and lean,
He sought his former neighbor,
Who now had grown so sleek and round,
He weighed a fraction of a pound,
And looked as if the art he'd found
Of living without labor.
"How is it, friend," he asked, "that I
Endure such thumps and knocks,
While you have grown so very gross?"
"'Tis plain," he answered; "not a loss
I've met since first I spun across
The contribution-box."
The Church Spider
Two spiders, upon a living bent,
Entered the meeting-house one day,
And hopefully were heard to say
"Here we shall have at least fair play,
With nothing to prevent."
Each chose his place and went to work;
The light webs grew apace;
One on the altar spun his thread,
But shortly came the sexton dread,
And swept him off, and so, half dead,
He sought another place.
"I'll try the pulpit next," said he,
"There surely is a prize;
The desk appears so neat and clean,
I'm sure no spider there has been;
Besides, how often have I seen
The pastor brushing flies."
He tried the pulpit, but alas!
His hopes proved visionary;
With dusting brush the sexton came,
And spoiled his geometric game,
Nor gave him time or space to claim
The right of sanctuary.
At length, half starved, and weak and lean,
He sought his former neighbor,
Who now had grown so sleek and round,
He weighed a fraction of a pound,
And looked as if the art he'd found
Of living without labor.
"How is it, friend," he asked, "that I
Endure such thumps and knocks,
While you have grown so very gross?"
"'Tis plain," he answered; "not a loss
I've met since first I spun across
The contribution-box."
What sub-type of article is it?
Poem
Fable
Satire
What themes does it cover?
Religious
Moral Virtue
Commerce Trade
What keywords are associated?
Church Spider
Fable
Sextons Brush
Contribution Box
Moral Tale
Literary Details
Title
The Church Spider
Key Lines
"'Tis Plain," He Answered; "Not A Loss
I've Met Since First I Spun Across
The Contribution Box."