Thank you for visiting SNEWPapers!
Sign up free
Poem
July 26, 1910
The New Haven Union
New Haven, New Haven County, Connecticut
What is this article about?
Humorous poem recounting the long history of a bawdy 'stag story' passed down from Neolithic times through ancient Egypt, Greece, and Rome, always told exclusively among men, until a woman named Belinda shares it.
Clipping
OCR Quality
92%
Excellent
Full Text
POEM.
THAT AWFUL STORY.
Yes, it must have been a corker
In the Neolithic era
When some primitive New Yorker
Said: "Say, howdja like to hear
Funny story--it's the latest?"
And he'd start and they'd look pleasant
(Though the females and the straight-
laced male persons were not present).
'Twas an aged tale, this hummer--
(Though the teller always swore that
It befell himself that summer.
Nonsense! Faked up years before that)
When some thousand decades after
In old Karnak (see inscriptions)
It was still retailed 'with laughter
(Women barred)
to the Egyptians.
Next it shone in dear old Hellas
In its after-dinner glory
Classed by diners-out as--well--as--
'M-ahem! a good stag story.'
And the Romans at their muttons
Had an anecdotal bent too.
For they told it and burst buttons
(With their spouses in absentia).
Crisper and more masculine
Age by age the tale's descended
Making proper persons finicky--
And to think the way it's ended!
Just to think! I'm fairly anguished;
For I called, and Shea--a bore--
When the conversation languished
She--Belinda--told that story!
THAT AWFUL STORY.
Yes, it must have been a corker
In the Neolithic era
When some primitive New Yorker
Said: "Say, howdja like to hear
Funny story--it's the latest?"
And he'd start and they'd look pleasant
(Though the females and the straight-
laced male persons were not present).
'Twas an aged tale, this hummer--
(Though the teller always swore that
It befell himself that summer.
Nonsense! Faked up years before that)
When some thousand decades after
In old Karnak (see inscriptions)
It was still retailed 'with laughter
(Women barred)
to the Egyptians.
Next it shone in dear old Hellas
In its after-dinner glory
Classed by diners-out as--well--as--
'M-ahem! a good stag story.'
And the Romans at their muttons
Had an anecdotal bent too.
For they told it and burst buttons
(With their spouses in absentia).
Crisper and more masculine
Age by age the tale's descended
Making proper persons finicky--
And to think the way it's ended!
Just to think! I'm fairly anguished;
For I called, and Shea--a bore--
When the conversation languished
She--Belinda--told that story!
What sub-type of article is it?
Satire
What themes does it cover?
Satire Society
What keywords are associated?
Awful Story
Neolithic Era
Stag Story
Ancient Civilizations
Belinda
Poem Details
Title
That Awful Story.
Form / Style
Rhymed Quatrains
Key Lines
Yes, It Must Have Been A Corker
In The Neolithic Era
Just To Think! I'm Fairly Anguished;
She Belinda Told That Story!