The Daily Dispatch

MATTESON, M. C., AND HIS JURY.

A capital story is told in the following extract from the Washington correspondent of the Buffalo Commercial, at the expense of an M. C. from Oneida county, New York, apropos of the corruption bills passed of late years by Congress:

A few years ago, a case was tried at Grand Rapids, Michigan, for stealing a large quantity of pork. He employed a lawyer of considerable local reputation to defend him, and although the affair had an ugly look, he was strongly in hopes of getting off clear; borne a rather suspicious character, was indicted. When the testimony was about to close, the lawyer was about to give up in despair. But the prisoner was as cool as a cucumber and insisted upon the defence being proceeded with. When the testimony was concluded, his guilt was as clear as the sun at noon-day. "Have you any evidence to refute this overwhelming array of testimony?" "Not a particle." "Then how the devil do you expect to get clear?" "I shall do well enough." "I tell you this is trifling and nonsense. You acknowledge you stole the pork, and they have proved it upon you, to the entire satisfaction of every man in court. Now, what can I say?" "Make a good speech, squire, and I'm safe to get off." "Impossible—there's nothing to be said." "I hired you, and I intended to pay you, but not a cent shall you have, unless you give the jury a talking to."

Under this inspiration, the lawyer made a rambling, incoherent address to the jury, in which everything was discussed except the case under consideration. On concluding, he whispered in the prisoner's ear—"You infernal scoundrel. I ought to be sent to the State prison myself; and what you expect to gain by this strange proceeding I can't conceive." "I'll tell you when the jury come in."

After a charge from the Judge, in which his criminality was distinctly asserted and maintained, that intelligent part of the "palladium of our rights" retired for consultation, and in a short time came back with a verdict of "not guilty."

"What in thunder does this mean?" inquired the lawyer of his client. "O, I wanted you to make a small fuss to pull the wool over the outsiders, but 'twas a sure thing from the start, for three of the jurymen had some of the pork."