Montgomery County Sentinel

Blabber's Letter.

Great Trouble and Suspense at Barnesville, and all about the Presidential Election-or non-Election.

BARNESVILLE, Jan. 16th, 1877.

Mr. Editor:--Something really must be done about the Presidential election-we are getting into a bad way altogether. I don't know whether every place is suffering like Barnesville, but presuming that such is the case, why, it is fairly to be concluded we are in a bad way. Sometimes we have the prospect of two or three presidents, and then the next thing we know, we have a prospect for none at all. Now, this kind of thing won't do. The only thing we can think about is the muddle, and that thinking is throwing out or freezing out our sentiment of cohesion-and if we don't soon get a president in some way, every man will be a sort of little president to himself.

These, however, are mere general views of our troubles. Let us go a little into detail and enumerate some of our difficulties. There is a tradition to the effect that once upon a time, about the holidays, people settled up and paid their debts. They didn't do that this time-very much. But how could they? when they don't know who is elected president. There are dozens able-bodied persons, colored and plain, who haven't gone to work or made any arrangements for doing so. Why? Why because they don't know who will be president while they will be dropping guano or drinking harvest whiskey. Then think of the many citizens who have pondered over the vexed question so much, that they don't know their own corncrib from any other man's-forget, in fact, that they have no corncrib of their own at all, and only by a lapse of memory remember that their neighbors have.

Our old friend Maripebble, up in the mountains, just reflect on his case. It is his habit to name the new arrivals in his family after the Presidents. Well he used up all the decent names in the list some two or three years ago and now he has a younker on hand-two of them I believe, who are growing up nameless. A settlement of the question in the ordinary way would relieve him some, but to grant him full relief he must either commit infanticide or insist on a duality in the office of chief executive.

Sam L. was going to quit drinking, swear off, when somebody was elected. I forget which candidate that event attached to.- No one is elected and Sam is perverse enough to look upon the complication as a providential dispensation in his favor, and he still "smiles."

I can't tell how many were going to be married, but have had to postpone the affair on account of the variableness of the political atmosphere. I think there are as many as six who are awaiting a settlement to make matrimonial proposals, and even more than that who are in suspense as to answers to proposals already made. Armswills boys can't go to school, nor can Tunesmiths' nor Nobles'; they are so much engrossed in the great question of the hour that they can't get their minds down to their books. So they are growing up uneducationless; they may do to represent us in the Legislature, if our standard remains as at present, but I fear as useful and steady citizens they won't be much. What few days they go to school they complain that they have no opportunity of expressing their opinions freely-the teacher interferes and stops it-and this they think is a clear case of intimidation, and justifies them in not making any "return"-to school-for several days-

The other day they stole some planks and went coasting down the hill, and when the teacher compelled them to bring them back they couldn't help saying that they had serious objections to "returning boards."

Now I havn't told you half that we are suffering under the present state of mixedness, but you can form some idea of the other half, and if you will call the attention of Senator Eliza Pinkston Sherman, and some of his sweet-scented colleagues to the matter we may get relief, and may not.

You will observe that all the proper names I use are fictitious. I find it won't do to call people by their own names in print, and if I should do so and even describe them as angels by brevet they would be offended and think it an ironical way of raking up some of their weaknesses, short-comings or over-comings.

You see, as I grow older I learn something.

A happy new year to you-happy at least for the eleven and a half months to come.

Yours,
BLABBER.