Bismarck Weekly Tribune

WHITHER ARE WE DRIFTING?

The above question is answered by the following items which we clip from an exchange published in the year 1987:

The sociable to be given by the ladies of the church next Friday evening will be a pleasant event. Miss Fannie Hightower, the most artistic dancer on the stage, has been engaged for the occasion, and James Loud, the champion faro dealer of the country, will be present to accommodate the lovers of that fashionable game.

While walking through the woods of Maine yesterday a man was so severely shaken by electricity that he narrowly escaped death. An examination proved that he had stepped on an old shoe worn by James G. Blaine, the magnetic statesman, during the campaign of 1888. He is still suffering from the shock.

In the legislature of Massachusetts yesterday, Miss Annie Pinkham, chairwoman of the committee on railroads, introduced a bill granting the right to vote to men. The bill was strongly opposed by Miss Belle Plaine, who denied that the men would have a tendency to purify the ballot. "Why," she exclaimed, in a burst of burning eloquence, "man now occupies the highest and most sacred sphere within the gift of God. He moulds the political and moral world by training the children and making home beautiful, while we are engaged in the coarser and more degrading pursuits of the jostling business world. [Applause.] Take him from his lofty sphere as queen of the home and place him in the cess pool of politics and you rob him of that gentleness and modesty which make him lovable and dear. [Cheers.] Think of your husband being dragged into a caucus, buttonholed and buzzed by every scheming politician with whom we are compelled to deal. [Cries of hear, hear, from the Hon. Mrs. Johnson.] Think of your husband being locked up with eleven women in a jury room night and day!! [Cries of "No, No."] Why, I tell you," shouted Miss Belle, as she threw open her Prince Albert coat and drew a large silk handkerchief from the pistol pocket of her pantaloons, "you pass this bill and you revolutionize our entire political and social systems, you ruin our homes and place our husbands, our sons and our brothers in a position to be insulted by every ward politician in the land." [Immense cheering, during which the eloquent Miss Belle retired to the bar in the basement and enjoyed a social glass with her admiring friends.]

A feature of the day's proceedings at the capitol was the pinning of bouquets on the lappels of the women's coats by the many beautiful men who occupied seats in the gallery. At the close of the meeting, Mr. John O'Brien favored the assembly with the solo, in his rich soprano voice, "When My Mary Comes Home from the War."

The only embarrassing episode of the day was the loss of Jack Waldron's bustle, which dropped while that popular gentleman was wheeling the baby in the corridor.