The Virginia Gazette

From the London Magazine.

A Modern Polite Conversation, as it really pass'd between Five young Ladies and a young Gentleman,
(who, to conceal their true Names,) are here called
Miss Courtly, Miss Fidget, Mr. Spritely, Miss Trifle,
Miss Edging, and Miss Weldon: Publish'd with a
Design to expose the Insipidity of Such Conversation ;
and to hint the Necessity of giving young People a
more Sober, virtuous, and useful Education than that
which is fashionable at present:

Court. Miss H! Miss Fidget, how well you came
to go with me to the Play t'other
Night!

Fidg. Oh, dear Miss Courtly! I beg
a
Thousand Pardons; but upon my
Life, it was not my Fault ; was it now, Mr. Spritely?

Sprite. No indeed, Mem, I'll answer for Miss Fidget ;
for I was with her all that Evening.

Court. I insist upon knowing where.

Sprite. Shall I tell, Miss Fidget ?

Fidg. Uh! no, don't tell, Mr. Spritely ; --.
--
yes,
hang it, you may too, if you will.

Sprite. Then, Mem, to tell you the Truth, Miss
Fidget , and my Sister, and I, were all at my Lady All-
night's Assembly.

Court. Oh! you wicked Things you! not to let me
know of it; when you had heard me so often say too,
how much I wanted to go. -- I swear, I take it mon-
strous ill. Pray, don't you think my Lady looks well
in her Sack?

Sprite. Oh! yes; most adorably fine.

Fidg. Oh monstrous ! I am astonished to hear you say
so; I think I never saw any Thing look so frightful! ----
and then She had got on the most horrible Tete de mouton
I ever saw.--.--Pray, do you know who is her Milli-
ner?

Sprite. Yes, Mrs. Lefanti, that makes up all the
Duchess's of Frippery's French Heads.

Fidg. Lord! I do not like 'em one Bit; besides, I
think the Coif's too forward a Mile.

Sprite. Oh! for that, I can assure you, Mem, they
wear 'em so ; they were all such at Court on the Birth
Night.

Fidg. Why, --was you there ? Lord! I am the most un-
fortunate Creature---.all that Day I was ill with a vio-
lent Pain in the Head----It always happens so, when I
am to go any where.--.--Well! if ever I make another
Engagement--.--Oh! Miss Trifle, when are you and I
to go to the new Opera? Will you go next Saturday?

Trif. Lord! Mem, I have seen it.

Fidg. Indeed! and how do you like it?

Trif. Oh! most violently ! the finest Thing!--.-- 'tis
full of Adagio.

Fidg. Oh ! that dear Adagio! --.-- I am charm'd with
the Adagio, 'tis so quick and nimble; and keeps up one's
Spirits ---- I detest any Thing dull --- Lord! what do
you think I heard last Night?

Trif. Lord! what? I don't know.

Fidg. Tho' I swear I don't believe there's any Thing
in it.

Trif. Well! but what?

Fidg. Why, that Farinelli is going away.

Trif. Oh, good God! I hope not.
I would not have
him go, without seeing him once more in Artaxerxes
for all the World.

Edg. Oh ! there is the sweetest Song in that dear Ope-
ra, that begins Sunkinevi chitati.

Sprite. Oh! that's Miss. Fairlove's favourite Song;
she's always humming it.

Fidg. Lord! Mr. Spritely, he can't sing. --- I never
heard any Body make such a terrible Noise in my Life.

Sprite. I assure you, Mem, she learns of Dr. Pepusch;
he comes home to her 3 Times a Week:

Fidg. Indeed! well, I think the Money and Time too
are thrown away upon her. ---- Oh lack-a-Day, Miss
Edging, when did you see Mr. Tattle?

Edg. Lord! Miss Fidget, why do you know Mr.
Tattle? I was dancing with him t'other Night. -- I swear,
I think, he's a mighty pretty Man.

Fidg. Devil! I am sure he gallanted me a Fan so last
Week, will cost me Half a Crown to get it new mounted:
Pray, Miss Edging, where did you buy your Fan? I
like it prodigiously.

Edg. I bought it in the City ; it cost me but Eighteeni
Pence.

Fidg: Well, I swear 'tis mighty pretty; I'll get one of
'em To morrow, if I live; --- they say, there is a new
fashion'd Sort of Fans just come up in France.---- Lord I
should like prodigiously to go to France. -- Miss Edging
let you and I go.
ay
Edg. Lord I should be afraid of the Sea ; besides they

Fidg. Oh! yes; when I was down at Portsmouth,
my Papa and Mama, and my Brother and I went all o-
ver in a Boat together to Gosport ; and I was not one bit
or crum sick ; and my Papa said I had a vast deal of
Courage.

Edg. Lord! I wonder at you; I am sure I should be
sick. --.-- I love riding better; my Brother has promis'd
to get me a new Pad this Spring.

Fidg. I thought you had one.

Edg. Yes, but a poor Thing! what can one do ? it
stumbles so, I had almost broke my Neck Three or Four
Times last Summer--.--then I am to go a Hunting too in
the Summer:

Fidg. Lord! I should love dearly to ride a hunting.
-..-I fancy it is mighty pleasant. ---- Was you ever a
hunting?-..- Do you ride well.

Edg. Yes, indeed, my Brother says I am a mighty
good Horse- Woman.

Fidg. I like a Coach best.

Edg. Oh ! I can't endure a Coach; it always makes
me sick. --- Lord! what d'ye think? I was at Quadrille
last Night, at Lady Fancy's, and won Four Sans pren-
dres running.

Fidg. Lord ! I don't like Quadrille one bit ; I think
Tradrille a vast deal prettier.

Edg. I swear I don't think so. ---- Lord! I have wretched
Fortune at Cards.

Fidg. Besides, I love Whisk the best of any Game.

Edg. Oh! that's a dreadful dull Game. .

Fidg. No, indeed, I think 'tis a charming pretty Game.
-- Mr. Weldon says I play very well at it; -- he always
loves to have me for his Partner; and he's counted a
top Player himself.

Edg. Pray, have you heard the new Singer?

Fidg. No, but I will To-morrow Night; pray, how
do you like him?

* Artaxerxes. : t Son quat navie agitare.i a.

..Edg
Edg. I don't know, -- o, o -- I don't think him so good as Conti:
Fidg. Lord! I heard a Gentleman say last Night, that understands Music very well, that he's better than Conti; what do you think Mr. Spritely?
Sprite. Oh! No, indeed, Mem, not so well as Conti.
Edg. Do you understand Music, Mr. Spritely?
Sprite. Oh! Nothing to speak of, Mem.
Fidg. Yes, indeed, Mr. Spritely plays very finely upon the German Flute; he learns of Weideman.
Edg. Lord! That is a dear Creature, that Weideman.
Fidg. Oh! but Martini is my Favourite, the fine Hautboy.
Edg. Oh! No; I like Femmy Nani bet. --- I heard that Mr. Handel should say, that he thought Femmy Nani the best Violin in the World. -- Oh! dear Miss Weldon, when was you dancing?
Weld. Last Friday Night.
Edg. How many Couple had you?
Weld. Nine.
Edg. Lord! I think Nine's too many; I like Eight Couple best. -- pray what Dances did you dance? Did you dance the new Dance? .-- there --- Lord! I forget the Name. .
Weld. What! Lord Tinsel's Fagary.
Edg. No.
Weld. What then! the new Hunt the Squirrel.
Edg. No, -- pith! that ever I should so forget. -- I have the foolishest Memory; 'tis something of Rar v.
Weld. Oh! I know what you mean; the Tipperary.
Edg. Yes, yes, yes, yes, that's it; -- 'tis a charming Dance. -- Pray, was Miss Patchit there?
Weld. Yes; she danc'd with young Barreau.
Edg. Lord! That's a frightful Fellow! What a terrible long Nose he has!
Weld. Yes, but he dances very prettily.
Edg. Lord! I am surpriz'd to hear you talk so. -- I never saw any Body poke out their Head so in my Life; --- besides, he keeps no Time. --- Pray now, had Miss Patchit got on her new Solitaire.
Weld. Yes; but I did not like it one bit; and they say, they are false Stones too.
Edg. And yet now I heard it commended prodigiously t'other Night. --- I want sadly to see it; tho' I don't believe I shall like it. -- Lord! what's a Clock! I must be going Home; --- to be sure my Papa will hang me for keeping the Horses out so long.
Weld. Oh! no, 'tis but 6 o' Clock.
Edg. Lord! I must go, --- by that Time I get Home and undress me, our Supper will be ready --- Miss Weldon, is your Chariot here? Or will you go Home in mine?
Weld. Lord! Isn't my Fellow here yet? --- Pray, Sir, [to the Footman] be so good as to tell my Man, he may go Home with the Chariot; for I shall go Home with Miss Edging. --- Oh Lord! who goes to the Masquerade!
All together. I, I, I, I.
Weld. What Habits have you got?
Court. Lord! I don't know; I must see about One To-morrow in the Afternoon.
Fidg. Lord! I have got a Chimney-sweeper.
Edg. And I have a Butcher.
Weld. And I am to be drest like a young Rake. -- I am to have my Brother's Cloaths --Oh! good God! 'tis a Quarter after Nine; I shall be hang'd for staying; for I promis'd my Mama to be at Home before 9. -- Come Miss Edging for God's Sake let's go. [Here a Proposal being made by Miss Courtly, they all Sate down to Cards.]