Alexandria Gazette & Advertiser

Mr. Editor--It has been truly remarked, that a wound to the vanity of an author, by severity of criticism, is more deeply felt than that of any other. The same observation, consequently, applies when a person, who has suddenly attempted 'philology,' is exposed as a verbose and stupid paragraphist. Such animals, unfit for an open literary combat, revert to slander, and all the malignant passions that can be engendered in their cold blooded, heartless system, where the snake prevails in eye & venom. The editor of the Herald comes forth, in this his natural hue, and attempts by innuendo, to bring forward Family matters. Ah! Mr. Pittman, my good sir, beware--but a huge sense of feeling forbids even any allusion. So, tell your coadjutor, who is known, however, if the editor of the 'Herald' intends to compose 'the Scandalous Chronicle' of Alexandria--which doubtless will be attempted in the style of the 'Secret History of St. Cloud'--a proper model for our new literary adept--let him begin some years back, and the volume may be swelled to a tolerable size. I close, by applying to him a few lines from a satirist, who thus treated such malignant scribblers:

Should Pittman publish you had stabb'd your brother,
Seduc'd your sister, or debauch'd your mother;
No just revenge on Pittman can be had,
Too dull for laughter, for reply too bad.

As an evidence of the standard of the editor of the Herald's powers of description, the National Intelligencer passes by his verbose rigmarole account of the national fete at Washington, and copies from the Gazette a piece written by a boy of thirteen years. As Mr. Pittman seems not likely to risk the nuptial benediction, let him attend to the fifth commandment

X.