The Ouachita Telegraph

The Darwinian Theory.

CAPUT.
A comely young monkey sat one day under the shade of a Banyan tree,
Idly tossing and turning the huge and ungainly volume of his pedigree.
His object, I forgot to state,
Was to hunt up the day and the date
When his glorious race was evolved from the Infusoria,
He sighed when he saw it and said "sic transit gloria mundi."

CORPUS.
He paused and smiled a smile with a glinting glimmer 'twixt his brow
And said, "for a wife I'll take a monkey maid, I will avow.
"And for a wife" said he—"but there's the rub."
"I like one without a tail—Or at least a stub"
"There's Miss Anthropus said he "with a tail as short as monkey's tail can be
"And her face is as nice—prognathous don't you see—well she's the girl for me."

PARS INTERMEDIA.
So one fine day when old Sol came out with a grin on his jolly old mug
A solemn old monk he pretty tightly corked the matrimonial jug
And set them afloat on life's cruel seas with his blessing—and a kiss to the bride if you please.

CAUDA.
From this fair pair of prognathous vertebrates
Sprung man's imperial race—Darwin thus relates
From prognathous vertebrates minus extremities caudal
Came man—Orthognathous vertebrate mammal—given to talking twaddle.