Carroll Free Press

MANNERS IN MISSOURI.

A member elect of the lower chamber of the Legislature of this State, was last year persuaded by some wags of his neighborhood that if he didn't reach the State House at 10 o'clock on the day of assembly, he could not be sworn, and would lose his seat. He immediately mounted with hunting frock, rifle and bowie-knife, and spurred till he got to the door of the State House, where he hitched his nag. A crowd were in the chamber in the lower floor on the ground walking about with their hats on and smoking cigars. Those he passed and ran up stairs into the Senate chamber, sat his rifle against the wall, and bawled out, "Strangers, whar's the man that swears me in?" at the same time taking out his credentials. "Walk this way," said the clerk, who was at this moment igniting a real Principe, and he was sworn without inquiry. When the teller came to count the noses he found that there was one Senator too many present, the mistake was discovered and the huntsman was informed that he did not belong there. "Fool, who! with the corn bread?" he roared. "You can't flunk this child, no how you can fix it.—I am elected to this here legislature;—I'll go ag'inst all banks and eternal improvements, and if there is any of you oratory gentlemen wat wants to get skinned, jist say the word, and I'll light on ye like a nigger upon a woodchuck. My constituents sent me here & if you want to floor this two legged animal, just hop on as soon as you please, for though I am from a back country, I am a little smarter than any other quadruped you can turn out of this drove!" After this admirable harangue, he put his bowie knife between his teeth, and took up his rifle with—"Come here, old Suke, stand by me!" at the same time presenting it to the chairman, who, however, had seen such people before. After some expostulation, the man was persuaded that he belonged to the lower chamber, upon which he sheathed his knife, flung his gun on his shoulder, and with a profound congee remarked, "Gentlemen, I beg your pardon; but if I didn't think that ar lower room was the groggery, may I be shot!"