Barbour Jeffersonian

Barbour Jeffersonian
WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 6.

Manners and Morals

Before introducing two people be quite sure that both desire the introduction, unless they are both your guests.

If the friend on whom you call is out, and you leave your name or card, you are to wait for a return before you call again.

A married man, even though he be professional, has no right to be familiar or well acquainted with another lady not a relative.

A husband will never permit his parents to impose upon his wife. He has no right to bring their ways into the house.

If you play the piano do not wriggle your body, or sway, or sprawl over the keys, or get your head down over your hands, as humbugs do.

Never lay your knife and fork on the table. Your plate is the place for them. When you send away your plate have your knife and fork on it.

Be careful what you talk about at the table. I once heard a woman describe where she got her false teeth made, and to illustrate took them out at table.

A lady will never call upon a gentleman, unless professionally, and not then without a companion, if possible a gentleman relative, at any rate a relative.

Big headed girls should wear their hair plain, and a girl with a large face should part her hair in the middle, and draw it down over the side a la Evangeline.

Never pour tea or coffee into a saucer. It is vulgar to drink from a saucer. And do not suck your tea and coffee in disgusting gulps. Make no noise at all.

You will sometimes see a boor eat from some general dish with his own spoon. He generally owns the house, and being a hog wouldn't permit any one else to do it.

Sitting in the same seat in a railway car is not an introduction, at least between people of opposite sexes. Young ladies cannot be too particular in this respect.

If you are with a lady and a gentleman doffs his hat to her doff yours, even though he be an enemy to you, provided the lady bowed to him first.

If you are in company, always eat as much as you want; but do not get so selfish that you put pickled oysters and ice cream on the same plate, as I have seen swine do.

Some men think they may pick their teeth at table if they only hold a napkin sprawling suggestively in front of their mouths. This is like putting plate-glass windows to a swill barrel.

If your friend has a distinguished or very talented guest do not try to get him to your house. If you have further acquaintance with him secure it through your friend, and under his supervision.

A foreigner, even though he be a persecuted Pole, should not talk much about how things are done in his country. It sounds as if he and the rest of the company had remained where he came from.

There is no harm in quadrille dancing, it is a harmless, pleasant exercise. Hugging dances like waltzing are going out of fashion; and, indeed, they are the relics of a licentious custom imported from the east where morals are not good.