The Virginia Gazette

Fortune a Goddess is to Fools alone,
The Wise are always Masters of their own. Dryd.

We are told in Fable, that when the Carter
found his Wheel stuck in the Mire, he fell on
his Knees, and pray'd Jupiter to help him;
but, it seems, the Waggon never stirr'd. Some
Travellers passing by, and observing the Fellow's
Condition, advised him to get up, whip his Horses;
let his Shoulder to the Wheel, and then pray to Jupiter;
he did so, and his Waggon presently got clear of the
Ruck.

By the Moral of this Fable we are taught, that the
Gods allow of human Means in human Affairs, and
that Miracles are not to be wrought upon every little Dis-
appointment: It shews also, that Providence itself is an
Enemy to Laziness and Sloth.

As the great Powers which the Vulgar place in this
Chimæra, may encourage Indolence and Neglect in Mens
private Affairs, I shall (I hope, without incurring the
Censure of Atheism) rob this imaginary Goddess, of
some of her false Attributes; I will endeavour to pull
down her Altars, and set up in their Place those of a much
greater Divinity, call'd Industry; and will venture to as-
sure the World, that whoever shall Sacrifice to this last,
will find her much kinder to her Votaries than Fortune.

But this I shall defer to another Paper; in the mean
Time I shall beg Leave to expatiate a little further up-
on Fortune; and as nothing illustrates a Maxim so well
as a Fable, I shall make choice of one upon this Subject,
which I shall translate from a foreign Author.

Infinite are the Numbers of those who complain of
Fortune, but very few acknowledge her Favours. This
Discontent has passed from Men to Beasts, according to
the System of the late Aesop. There is not an Ani-
mal so stupid but grumbles, or rather brays at For-
tune. The Ass, since we must name him, went from
Assembly to Assembly, to make the Complaints of his
Condition heard; he met with Compassion from his
Companions, as his Grievances seem'd to be common
with their own. It is said, that at the Instigation of
several Quadrupedes of other Families, he, at length,
presented himself at an Audience before Jupiter; where,
in an humble Posture, having, in his simple Way, beg-
ged Leave to open the Business that brought him there;
it was granted him; he began in this miserable Way
to open his more miserable Complaint.

"O most upright Jupiter! to whom I address as Judge,
not as Revenger, behold now in your Presence the weak-
est and most miserable of all Creatures; I come not
here so much for Revenge for the Injuries I daily suffer,
as for some Redress. Can your Integrity, O immor-
tal Jupiter! allow the Injustice of Fortune towards
me? If she is blind, it is only to me; to me She is a
cruel Stepmother, a perfect Fury. Nature has made
me as I am, the most stupid of all Animals; why then
must this Barbarian make me the most miserable? Is
not this trampling all Justice under Foot? In me he
persecutes Innocence, and in others, favours Iniquity.
The proud Lion triumphs, the cruel Tyger lives, the
subtle Fox cheats with Impunity, the Wolf devours
the Flocks of others; yet I, who do no Injuries to any,
must suffer them from all. As I am patient, I am ever-
labour'd, and so loaded, that I sink under the Weight.
Carresses I never receiv'd, but am corrected even to the
End of my Ears, and that as long as my Journey lasts.
As to my Diet, even I hiss less, the Refuse of all Beasts,
is grudged me; I never eat a thousandth Part of a Belly
full, and if I stop upon the Road but a Minute, I find
immediately a Shower of Blows fall upon my Back;
besides I am neglected, and so ill accouter'd, that
what with my Ugliness, I am not fit to appear before
Persons of Condition; so that I am reduc'd to serve
Peasants and Clowns, who use me as they please; and
this touches me more sensibly than all the rest.

This Harangue made Impression upon the Auditors;
but Jupiter, who is always the same; was nothing mov'd;
with a grave and magisterial Air he made a Sign, by
which he signified his Will, that Fortune should have
Notice to appear, in order to be heard in her Turn; im-
mediately several Persons of different Conditions, Men of
Business, Scholars, &c. went in Quest of Fortune, but
without thinking to inform themselves where he was
most likely to be found, they searched a Thousand differ-
ent Places, but found her not; they enquired of a Mul-
titude where she lived, but met with no Person who could
shew them. They ran as fast as they could to the lofty
Palace of powerful Credit; there the Confusion was so
great, and every one possess'd with his own Business,
that so far from answering them, scarce any Body saw
them. From thence they posted to the Palace of Riches,
but Care, who stood at the Threshold, told them, in a
very melancholy Tone, that Fortune, indeed, had often
made-short Visits there, but that she always brought
with her Thorns. Upon this Intelligence, our Couriers,
without making any Reply, pass'd on, and made the best
of their Way to the House of Wisdom, there they met
with what they did not look for; for Poverty was the
first Thing which presented her self to their Eyes, who
said to them, Fortune is not here; we wait for her, it is
true, but not with Impatience.

In fine, after many fruitless Enquiries, our Travellers
at length, discovered at a Distance, a most glittering and
sumptuous Edifice, which look'd like the Work of Fairies;
they hasten'd towards it, and when they came near this
enchanted Place, they perceived all Entrances to it were
shut up. This extreme Caution persuaded them they
were at the End of their Enquiry; they called out, mak-
ing Use of the name of Jupiter, whose Deputies they said
they were: Then Fortune came forth from a private
Corner, whither she sometimes withdrew from the Im-
portunity of Mortals; our Deputies, whom she received
with a smiling Countenance, declared their Commission,
and then withdrew.

In a Moment Fortune convey'd her self to the Throne
of Jupiter; the Press was very great to see her, but much
greater to be seen by her: In the mean Time Jupiter
spoke to her in the following Terms.

What is the Meaning, Fortune, that we are every Day
troubled with Complaints of your Conduct? I know it
is not easy to content one Man, harder to content many,
and next to impossible to Content all. I know also, that
some, weary of being at their Ease, murmur for some Trif-
le which they want, while ungrateful to you, they enjoy
every Thing else in Abundance. It is strange that Men
should see all the Good in other Peoples Conditions, with-
out any of the Evil; and, on the contrary, all the E-
vil in their own, without any Mixture of the Good.

When Men cast their Eyes upon a crown'd Head, they
are dazzled with the Lustre of a Diadem, yet those
who wear it, are charged with a heavy Burden. This is the Reason I have given to little ear to the Complaints of Men always dissatisfied with their Condition, whatever it be.

But the present Complainant against you, Fortune, lays before us a Grievance of a particular Nature, he pretends his Misfortune is without Example, and that you are the Cause. Let's hear what you have to lay in your own Defence.

At first, Fortune was tempted to laugh at Jupiter's Manner of summing up the Accusation against her, but recollecting where she was, she composed herself, and with a serious Air said, Most Sovereign Jupiter, I shall make use of no more than Three Words, to justify myself in what's alleged against me, if you will vouchsafe to hear them; my Adversary, now present before your Majesty, complains of his being an Ass; and whose Fault is that?

The whole Audience was pleased with this Answer, Jupiter subscribed to it, and added a Reprimand for the Instruction of so silly a Complainant: Poor Creature, you would not have been miserable, if you had had any Conduct; go, and for the Future, imitate the Vigilance of the Lion, the Cunning of the Fox, the Prudence of the Elephant, the Precaution of the Wolf; and for the Future, apply yourself to the Means conducing to the End you desire, and you will attain it: Then raising his Voice, Let all Men once in their Lives, be undeceived in what relates to Happiness or Misfortune, and let them know the Spring of one, is Wisdom, and of the other Folly.

Ludere qui necit, competribus abtiret armis;
Ind Etufq: pilæ, difcive, trechive, quiefcit;
Ni piffe rifum tollant impune coro:e :
Qui necit, verfus tamen audet fingere.

Hor. de Arte Poet.