New Hampshire Statesman And State Journal

From a late Liverpool Paper.

WOMAN'S CONSTANCY.
BY MISS SKEFFINGTON.
A FAIR INCONSTANCY

Miss Emmeline Jamieson, a pretty blue-eyed flaxen-haired Scottish Lassie, appeared, at the polite request of the magistrate of the Clerkenwell Police Court, to show cause why she detained a brooch, a coral necklace, a gold ring, and also a chest of drawers, a bedstead and bedding, and half-a dozen chairs, alleged to be the property of one William Mathews.

The complainant, a straight-haired, simple looking youth, stepped into the witness-box, with a mincing air, and was about to state his case, when the Magistrate told him that if the articles claimed were his property he could not by law be a witness, but if he had any one to prove the possession and detaining by the young lady, they could proceed with the case.

"Oh! dear sir," interposed Miss Emmeline, "I have got the things, and I mean to keep them too—(a laugh)—and I will prove he gave them to me."

Complainant (sighing:) "Yes sir; but they were to be wedded gifts, and I only left them with her to take care of till after the event."

The Magistrate: "Oh, this is a love affair I perceive. Then you have agreed to get married, I suppose."

Complainant: "Ye-e-s, sir. (A laugh.)"

The Magistrate: "How was it you were not?"

Complainant: "She is a fickle inconstant girl. We were to have been married last Sunday week, and I was there at the time appointed to meet her, but, after waiting for upwards of three hours, I found that I had been made a fool of. 'Oh! Emmy, Emmy!' continued the complainant, clasping his hands and turning to his inamorata, 'think how I've adored you; you! 'my first, my last, my only love, and then to serve me so.'"

In reply to this pathetic remonstrance, Miss Emmeline looked calmly at Mr. Mathews for a moment, and then hid her face in her snowy white handkerchief, and—laughed heartily.

Complainant: "And you know, Emmy, love you have disappointed me in this way no less than three times, and the banns have been asked out ever since last May."

The Magistrate asked the complainant whether he knew any reason why Miss Jamieson had failed so remarkably in her troth?

Complainant (dolefully:) "Oh, dear, no. sir: for when I called to scold her for it her four sisters set upon me, and quite mobbed me: and there was a fierce-looking young gentleman, with whiskers, and very black curled hair, sitting on the sofa, and so I thought it advisable to leave. (Laughter.)"

The Magistrate observed that the conduct of Miss Emmeline appeared so far to have been very capricious, and asked her if she had any explanation to offer?

Emmeline: "He gave them to me, sir, and I have a witness to prove it."

The Magistrate: "Then call your witness."

Here a flashy-attired young gentleman, answering the description given by the complainant, stepped forward, and, by the look of tender admiration which she occasionally gave, the watery tie the belle Emmeline's conduct in quitting her lover was at once explained.

Mr. Henry Manvers described himself an actor in 'the walking gentleman's line,' and gave his evidence with much action and dramatic emphasis, which created great amusement. The point of it, however, seemed to be, that he, Mr. Henry Manvers, had been present on the occasion when he heard Mr. Mathews say to the young lady, 'Emmy, my sweet, they are yours, and yours only;' but Mr. Henry Manvers could not say whether the word they' related to the property in question or not.

The Magistrate (to Emmeline;) "Your explanation is by no means satisfactory. Which will you do, marry Mr. Matthews or give up the property?"

Emmeline (starting with seeming surprise:) "Oh, my gracious, sir!—neither I hope."

The Magistrate: "Oh, but you must do one or the other. The banns have already been asked out, you know. (A laugh.)"

Emmeline (hesitating and looking confused:) "Well, sir; dear me, I—I—I don't know, sir," (here she caught the eye of the complainant, who appeared to be trembling and anxious for her reply.) "Well, sir, I think I" (at this moment she had turned to Henry Manvers, which at once seemed to settle the point.) "Oh, sir, he shall have his property and welcome. (Great laughter.)"

Complainant: "But if I go for them I shall see this fierce young gentleman again—(laughter.)"

Magistrate: "I'll send an officer with you so that you shan't be molested."

The parties then left the court, the fickle Emmeline leaning on the arm of the actor, and her discarded lover accompanied by a constable.