The Daily Independent

Woman sums up essentials in rearing of children:
"Love them, teach them self-discipline by disciplining them, then leave them alone."

They were coming home from a lecture on child psychology: an older woman whose children were out of the nest and a younger one who was in the throes of rearing her young brood. "If I had only known, when my children were young, what I know now I could have made a much better mother. I worked in the dark and practically everything I did was wrong. I wonder that my children are not in jail," wailed the older woman.

"I am not so sure about that," replied the younger one: "My mother had never seen the inside of a book on child psychology but her method of bringing us up was 100 per cent better than my method with my children. I have a bookcase full of volumes on parenthood and all the problems. I can tell you what every recognized authority has to say on the subject. I have tried out most of the theories that have been recommended. As a result my little girl is as nervous as a cat and I am three jumps behind her."

"Mother didn't know what the experts thought but she had some thoughts on the subject and she summed them up in a few words: 'Love them, teach them self-discipline by disciplining them and leave them alone.' We adored her; we obeyed her and we considered her our best friend. We were allowed to lead our own lives but we took her in because we wanted her in. We consulted with her about everything and usually accepted her advice. When we didn't we regretted it.

"My father drank heavily and she couldn't count on him for moral support. She didn't try to conceal the fact from us, yet she taught us to love him for his generosity and his kindness and to pity him for his weakness. We never heard her say a cross word to him; so our home life was happy but we noticed that she was gay and talkative when he was sober and sad and silent when he was drinking. She did it this without the help of modern psychology and she did it with character, common sense and sentiment. From here out I am going by her recipe. I am going to love mine, discipline them and leave them alone."

Isn't that the crux of the matter? Little children aren't happy in a home unless they are cushioned in affection. But if the affection isn't tempered with common sense nobody in the home with them can be happy. Any mother who loves her child so much she can't say no is short on common sense and she has no real thought for the child's welfare.

CAROLINE CHATFIELD.

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