The Virginian

EXAMINATION FOR ATTORNEY AT LAW.

It was just twenty one years old when I underwent my examination for attorney at law, and although some time has passed, yet there remains enough of my recollection of that time and previous periods to that time to prevent its being forgotten. I had been preparing myself, night and day, for about nine months, and my first thoughts on the morning of that eventful day were, that I was now fit—I examined myself from head to foot, and exclaimed, now I am a man, and have natural claims upon my fellow-beings that I never had before. I had no fears (as most young men do) that if I succeeded in my examination, as well as in the world, it would not be long before I made a fortune. I thought I had nothing left but my examination—in these questions—perhaps he net one—open an old shelf in my trunk to see if I had left any thing undone. I arrived at the place of examination in due season.

The courtroom trembled to its foundation with consequential looks—I blushed back my fear with intrepid grace, yet I felt that I was growing pale as a corpse. Oh, how the other students who were to undertake the legal ordeal as well as myself, come after me; some walked in with such a knowing look, that I felt my heart sink when I thought they were to be my competitors: a crown of knowledge overhung their countenances, and they looked significantly on all around them. I took particular notice of these students, and every one of them was rejected. Others entered with a modest look, on their tip-toes, treading as though they were afraid lest any violent motion of their bodies might discompose their brains, they stared at the examiners, as though they were ghosts. Each took his seat according to the order in which he was called the examination commenced. As soon as the first question was asked, all eyes were directed upon the poor culprit that was to suffer

What is law? said one of the judges—and notwithstanding this was spoken in a soft, mild tone, yet it had such an effect upon the poor fellow, that his face changed to a yellowish color, and his body trembled as though he was dropping under a violent fit of ague; at last his courage assumed its wonted tone. What is law, did you say, sir? Yes, sir, what is law? 'Why, sir, law is—that is—a rule of action—it signifies—that—that is—'Well, sir what is it? Did you say how many parts it was divided into?' said the student and without waiting for an answer exclaimed, 'there are two kinds of law. and these are—' Stop, said the examiner, that was not the question; however, we will give it to the next—you other answers will do very well.' The examiner was a feeling as well as a learned man, and knew very well the poor fellow could answer it, if he was not in such perturbation.

The second student hemmed and hawed—'Law, taken in its comprehensive sense, signifies' Here he made a full stop— 'So far, said the examiner, Mr. A. has answered.' 'Yes, sir, replied the student : and after much exertion he stammered through the answer, not as one who is confused, but as if ignorant of the subject he was handling. He had no sooner wound up the question than he began to laugh, but only so loud that those who were near to him could hear it. I was one of those, and felt vexed at his impertinence and rude behavior and thought over some plan to even the score offered to my friend, for we were intimate. I accidentally set my foot upon one of his toes, and immediately he jumped up , and made very softly. As soon as he turned his head to me, I, as unconscious of what I had done, shook my head at him, which he took to signify, he ought to be ashamed of himself—he, in his turn man, shook his head at me his face glowed with indignation in one hand he held his foot, and pulled his hair with the other : in fact I expected soon to see him laugh on the other side of his mouth,—as soon as I was compelled to know from his expressions what I had done, I affected a great deal of sorrow, and begged a thousand pardons, which he could not but grant. though I saw that while he exclaimed 'certainly, sir, certainly'—his heart swore vengeance. My attention was now called to my question ; all levity immediately vanished, and my spirits, which had till this time been so high, now sunk, and became depressed. I would willingly have retired, and studied another year, if I could have done so with honor.

Now came the thrilling sound:—' Mr. Subpoena,' said my examiner,'we have heard that law is divided into two kinds —will you have the goodness to tell me what they are?' As soon as the question was given to me, my heart sunk clear into my belly'—it felt as though it was wrapped up in a piece of woollen cloth, such a singular sensation I never before or since experienced, At last I summoned courage enough to put this question to the examiner—' What did you say, sir ?' He repeated his interrogation.

Now if any man, at another time, had put this question to me, with the same expectation I could not answer it, I would have knocked him down for an impertinent blockhead. But at this time it seemed as if he could not have given me a more difficult one; my ideas were like a bark on a boisterous ocean, not remaining a second on one place, but floating and tossing about continually. This was my reply—'It is, sir—is divided into two parts.'—'Well, we have heard that, what are those two parts?' 'Good and bad,' said I immediately, as if recollecting myself.

This answer (as well as it might) raised a universal laugh in which the examiner joined (or to the contrary) Good heavens—now I turned with redoubled attention I could only wish that I was a Hercules, or a Sampson, to have crushed him to death ; my blood boiled in my veins, and in my mind I snatched up a pen that lay before me, with the serious intention of challenging every one, (there was no less than about a hundred) but the want of paper, or something else, restrained me, and my attention was called to concerted murmurs not to join me, who had arisen from his seat, and placing his hands on his sides, seemed convulsed with laughter. A tear came in my eye—it was not the tear of sympathy, or woe, it was the burning tear of anger. It was wonderful how this vent of passion softened me—I sat down apparently composed, and turned my attention to the fellow on whose corn I had trodden—when he saw me looking at him he essayed to laugh, but only arrived at a grin. Very good, said he —'ha, ha, ha, I'm most suffocated! oh my corn—ha! oh! ha!' d—n you, sir, you might have known how much pain it would cost no—but good and bad,' ha, ha.—'oh dear—oh dear!' This was the way the poor fool continued until the examiner asked for silence, which if they had not speedily done, I should have given my neighbor more cause of complaint than his corn. This circumstance did me more good than harm, for now I felt perfectly composed, and ready for the worst question. The spell which had bound me and smote which science was not the ice had broken, and my ideas seemed settled. The examiner was the last to address me— 'Well, sir,' said he,'you never is Y , sir,' said I, considerably per— —'it is not correct.'

W., sir, which then?

Why, sir, the manner in which law is divided into two kinds—the lex non scripta, the unwritten or Common law—and the lex scripta, the written or statute Law.' I had several other questions given to me, which I answered with equal precision and correctness, and my only regret was that they were not more difficult that I might convince my scoffers that I was not the booby they took me for.

The examination went on, some had more courage and less knowledge and more nonsense, and answered accordingly.

The question had now come to the person whom I saw make so merry with my mistake, he was a conceited young coxcomb, whose vanity was detestable and whose pride and ill manners had excited the dislike of all his companions. Oh, how I hoped that he might make as great a blunder as I did, nor was I doomed to disappointment.

Thus passed the examination, and after a considerable time, and undergoing a mental, as well as a physical sweat, a person was appointed to us to hand out Licenses and we were dismissed

During the interim I suffered amazing.—I felt as though my all depended entirely upon my debut. I was one of the first in the room at the appointed time; when we had all assembled, we more resembled so many calves than attorneys at law!—The list was produced, and the names read : the first was mine—I heard the Judge pronounce it, but I heard no more. I felt every animosity my happy less cured complete—my heart bounded for joy—I left the room —that very day hired an office—put up a large gilded sign, that stared every body in the face, with this inscription, Higgins Subpoena Attorney at Law? It was not long before I was retained in a suit ; and in my next I shall inform you what were my feelings on this one occasion, as well as the nature of my first suit

To Il then be ey me to be

Your well wisher,

HIGGINS SUBPOENA.