The New Hampshire Gazette

POETRY.

From the Catskill Recorder.

A DUEL.

Jack and Joe had a quarrel,
A lad who ne'er had injured friend or foe;
So that one night by chance,
('Twas at a country dance,)
He set his heel directly on Jack's toe;
To tread upon one's toe is not so much,
But Jack had corns and could not bear a touch.

Jack then let slip a furious oath,
That one of them should fall or both;
And hasted home a challenge to indite,
For be it known, Jack could not write
A single word;
So 'twould have been in him monstrous absurd,
T' try to put his thoughts in black and white
He did much better,
He got Sam Scratch to write the letter.

When Joe received the gentle billet doux,
He trembled and look'd rather blue;
Indeed 'twas no great wonder,
For thus the challenge ran:
"Fire and thunder!
You same Joe,
That trod upon my toe,
Meet me tomorrow like a man;
I'll make the light shine through you, if I can,
Your friend, et cetera, Jack Blunder."

Now though poor Joe was terribly alarm'd
Fearing perchance he might not 'scape unharm'd,
He it accepted,
And this was more than Jack expected.

Who in his turn was almost scared to death,
Well knowing that a ball might stop his breath;
But he had gone too far to turn about-
Of course resolv'd to fight it out.

Suppose at length the warriors in the field.
Scarce yet determined for to fight, or yield;
With heavy heart each took his stand,
A pistol in his trembling hand,
With powder loaded;
For, reader, let me whisper in your ear,
The seconds wisely left out lead, for fear
Their friends might be by bullets incommoded.

The word was given-off went the pistols-
crack,
Flat as a flounder fell heroic Jack,
And cried aloud in piteous strain,
"Alas, my friends, I'm slain! I'm slain!"

Joe hearing this, thought it was true forsooth,
For sure a dead man would speak nought but truth,
And fearing that perchance the law,
On him might lay its heavy paw,
He left the field, forsook his native shore,
Went off to sea, and ne'er was heard of more.

Jack having found at length he was not dead,
Got up, went home, and sneak'd away to bed.

PINDER, JUN.