Gold Hill Daily News

MUCH ADO ABOUT NOTHING.—One of the many experiences in this country, that has resulted from the necessity of having to build most public houses with nothing but slender partitions to divide the rooms, is that of being involuntarily made to listen to the different scenes that nightly occur on the other side of the wall. It is not our purpose to explain the annoying effect such things have on our own senses, nor dwell on what we imagine to be the various embarrassments that would be felt by parties, if they knew any persons were hearing them in the next room; but merely relate what was to us an amusing occurrence which took place at a certain hotel on B street, Virginia, a few nights ago, in one of the thinly separated apartments to be found there.

We had retired about twenty minutes before, and were just dropping off into our accustomed slumber when we were suddenly aroused by a noise which sounded very much as if some one had fallen out of bed. Listened for a moment, and then followed what appeared to be blows of some kind, accompanied by a man's voice in these somewhat smothered tones: "For God's sake, Olive, stop!" Numerous horrid thoughts flittered through our head at that moment, and our curiosity had arrived at the highest pitch, but we considered that the fate of our item partly hung upon the event of our making no disturbance, and we consequently kept quiet.

By this time, the man had released himself so much as to be able to regain the floor with his feet and was standing apparently braced against the door, judging from the rattling it made each time the woman brought her battery to bear on him. Once more he exclaimed, "For God's sake, stop!" The inexorable wife, however, again reinforced herself, and would have completely annihilated him this time, we expect, but having changed her mind, or being dexterously prevented from so doing by the husband, she was made to bring up at the wash-stand, and then we heard a tremendous shaking of bottles with a loud warning from the husband not to touch a certain one marked "brandy."

But, like all other women, she would have her own way if she could, and the husband was obliged to leave the place where he had fortified himself and throw his right wing—right arm—between her and the brandy. He managed to capture the bottle, but did not then gain a complete victory, for it seems she had retained the only means by which to prevent the brandy from escaping, and it was only a moment after that we heard him pleading for the cork. At this stage of the proceedings, the woman had the decided advantage and should have kept it, but in an unguarded moment, actuated by uncontrollable passion, she let fly the cork and placed herself 'hors du combat.'

We were about to holler out "dry up," at this point, when we reflected upon the consequences of uncalled-for interference in family quarrels, and again held our peace. The time had now come for compromise, and the husband was beseeching the wife to know why the devil she was acting thus? He asked her this important question, which explained what the blows referred to in the beginning of the article were composed of: "Did I give you money to buy those boots to be used as a weapon against me?" This is not the first time we have heard of a leather battery.

"Why do you treat me so?" and other interrogations followed, but only sobs could now be heard in reply. The supplicating tones of the husband were already beginning to make an impression, and the wife rallied enough to ask several questions and to partly justify herself for her strange conduct. It really appears that she had suspicions of his not being true to her, and she had taken this method—not a novel one in married life—of finding how much truth there was in them. He now requested her in the most plaintive tones imaginable, to return to her bed, and we are happy to say she returned. There was no more sorrow, no more gnashing of teeth; but the last we heard was the sound of a kiss, and we presume what followed next was—a reconciliation.