The Virginia Gazette

A Key to the Virginia Gazettes.

MDCCLXVI.

Neque hac altercatio nostra vobis inutilis erit.

P. C. plerumque enim respublica privatis crescit

Inimiciis; ubi nemo civis, qualis fit vir, pote

latere

CICERO.

I.

Sing, Muse, what writers, good and bad,

What wildly gay, or gravely mad,

Have shone in sixty six;

Such writers men have seldom seen,

Some give your orator the spleen,

Some few his fancy fix.

II.

Defend me, Gods! there's zealous Ben,

Who foredecries the best of men--

BLAND, NICHOLAS, and each NELSON;

Whene'er he lacks his chattering tongue,

Pert Slander claps her wings,

And Hell says wondrous well, Son.

III.

But who Ben is I'll not disclose,

Perhaps he'd wring the Muse's nose,

Or rudely roar damn her;

'Tis dangerous, in these stormy times,

To whisper e'en the name of

SLEDGE-HAMMER.

IV.

A Buckskin ample, thick and tough,

Well tann'd, may make a dismal puff

And ill tun'd organ's bellows;

Methinks I hear a jarring noise

(Forc'd from the scolding keys, by boys)

And cry, brave fellows!

Methinks (the vast machine, behind)

I see him swell the bag, with wind,

Then voiding blasts sonorous;

Till (wrapt to th' idiot's paradise)

Exulting--DEAR ourselves (he cries)

Unstunn'd, none stand before us.---

VI.

O night portentous! to the skies

Vast syllabubs, in froth, arise—

The work of METRIOTES;

Good Randolph drop your labour's vain,

Forsake polemicks, burn your pen,

Cajole the BURGESSES.

VII.

See Manners beam, from ill bred WAYLES;

See MANNERS, fraught with fairy tales—

The bastard of St. Judas!

God send that MANNERS, praising MANNERS,

(And all that follow Folly's banners)

Were banish'd to Bermuda's.

VIII.

The names of THESE (who reason brav'd,

And high contempt) which BURKE engrav'd

On two-fold Fame's black portal;

Within her temple loud the dame

(That arbitress of praise and blame)

Proclaim'd his own immortal.

IX.

Dan Hewitt and just Eyre approve

(Nor partial they, to him they love)

The bard's renown ascertain'd;

They glow with pleasure, yet complain

That sometimes rhetorick, truth, are vain

Since Henry lies encurtain'd.

X.

Not so tho' God (who fir'd the breast

Of that just reasoner) says, in haste,

Shall MAIA's SON abandon

The friend of man and liberty?

No, RATIONALIS ne'er shall die,

'Till all men rave, like Landon.

Nor shall the Constitution's

FRIEND,

Said

GRATITUDE,

with

me descend,

Unknown,

to

Lethe's

strand;

The man

(whose

youth

his

country's cause

Sustain'd,

whose

age

asserts

her

laws)

Is

still

the

patriot

BLAND.

XII.

Behold! shrewd, elegant,

jocose,

A Dryden or in rhyme or prose

The oriental

PROPHET;

The glowing

soul

his

writings show;

But,

wicked

HEWITT,

how could'st thou

Plunge Ben, so deep

in Tophet?

XIII.

DIKEPHILOS, thy worth sublime

(Too great for feeble prose or rhyme)

Exceeds my best endeavour;

Yes,

MILNER,

great's thy worth indeed,

But reins restrain a mettled steed,

Shears verging

boughs dissever.

XIV.

Thus sung, at ease, in lowly state,

(Resign'd, with coolness, to her fate)

Th' rural muse of Chellowe:

Some may perhaps her notions join,

Others aver (replete with wine)

The prattling girl is mellow.

XV.

In calm or tempest quite the same,

She cautious weighs or praise or blame

Her soul upbraids the fire

With wishes, there were justly due;

Re-proves the shelves and quicksands shew,

Both useful hints inspire.