Thank you for visiting SNEWPapers!
Sign up free
Story
August 16, 1859
The Hillsdale Standard
Hillsdale, Hillsdale County, Michigan
What is this article about?
On a Mississippi steamboat, an Illinois Sucker pranks a vain young Virginian by mocking his 'first family' status and offering shoats for a 'second family' introduction, flattering him with a resemblance to John Randolph before departing with a parting jest.
Clipping
OCR Quality
75%
Good
Full Text
Old Virginia.
An Illinois Sucker took a great dislike
to a foolish young Virginian, who was a
fellow passenger with him on one of the
Mississippi steamboats. I was on the boat
(said Doo little) and saw the whole affair.
The Virginian was continually combing
his hair, brushing his clothes, or dusting
his boots--to all which movements the
Sucker took exceptions, as being what he
termed "a little too damn nice by half."
He finally drew up his chair by the side
of the Virginian and said:
"Whar might yo be from stranger"
"I am from Virginia, sir," politely answered the gent.
"From old Virginny, I s'pose?" says the Sucker.
"Yes sir, old Virginia," was the reply
"You are pretty high up in the pictur's
thar. I s'pose?"
"I don't know what you mean by that
remark, an."
"Oh, nuthin," says the Sucker, but that
you are desp'rately rich, and have been
brought up right nice."
"If this information will gratify you in
any way," says the gent, patronizingly,
smoothing down his hair, "I belong to one
of the first families.
"Oh, of course." answered the Sucker.
Well, stranger, bein you belong to the
fust, I'll just give you two of the fattest
shoats in all Illinois, ef you'll only find
me a feller that belongs to one of the second
Virginny families."
"You want to quarrel with me sir," says
the Virginian.
"No, stranger, not an atom," answered
the Sucker. but I never seed one of the
second family, and I'd gin suthin to git a
eight at one of 'em. I know you are one
of fust, cause you look just like John Ran-
dolph."
This mollified the Virginian -the hint of
a resemblance to that statesman was flat-
tering to his feelings, and he accordingly
acknowledged relationship to the orator.
"We know, descended from the In-
ts, sir," answered the other.
Sucker, who
under queer thing
-I Levi
ting olig dhim to bo
i unIngin, John Ran
t, 91i!
I tint the Sucker pulled
his
head away suddenly! They were sep
arated. Sucker got off at a land
ing.
As he stepped down shore
he called to the Virginian on the
boat:
"Old Virginny, remember -two
shoats
for that second Virginia family!"
An Illinois Sucker took a great dislike
to a foolish young Virginian, who was a
fellow passenger with him on one of the
Mississippi steamboats. I was on the boat
(said Doo little) and saw the whole affair.
The Virginian was continually combing
his hair, brushing his clothes, or dusting
his boots--to all which movements the
Sucker took exceptions, as being what he
termed "a little too damn nice by half."
He finally drew up his chair by the side
of the Virginian and said:
"Whar might yo be from stranger"
"I am from Virginia, sir," politely answered the gent.
"From old Virginny, I s'pose?" says the Sucker.
"Yes sir, old Virginia," was the reply
"You are pretty high up in the pictur's
thar. I s'pose?"
"I don't know what you mean by that
remark, an."
"Oh, nuthin," says the Sucker, but that
you are desp'rately rich, and have been
brought up right nice."
"If this information will gratify you in
any way," says the gent, patronizingly,
smoothing down his hair, "I belong to one
of the first families.
"Oh, of course." answered the Sucker.
Well, stranger, bein you belong to the
fust, I'll just give you two of the fattest
shoats in all Illinois, ef you'll only find
me a feller that belongs to one of the second
Virginny families."
"You want to quarrel with me sir," says
the Virginian.
"No, stranger, not an atom," answered
the Sucker. but I never seed one of the
second family, and I'd gin suthin to git a
eight at one of 'em. I know you are one
of fust, cause you look just like John Ran-
dolph."
This mollified the Virginian -the hint of
a resemblance to that statesman was flat-
tering to his feelings, and he accordingly
acknowledged relationship to the orator.
"We know, descended from the In-
ts, sir," answered the other.
Sucker, who
under queer thing
-I Levi
ting olig dhim to bo
i unIngin, John Ran
t, 91i!
I tint the Sucker pulled
his
head away suddenly! They were sep
arated. Sucker got off at a land
ing.
As he stepped down shore
he called to the Virginian on the
boat:
"Old Virginny, remember -two
shoats
for that second Virginia family!"
What sub-type of article is it?
Deception Fraud
Curiosity
What themes does it cover?
Deception
Social Manners
What keywords are associated?
Illinois Sucker
Young Virginian
Steamboat Prank
First Families
John Randolph
Deception
What entities or persons were involved?
Illinois Sucker
Young Virginian
John Randolph
Where did it happen?
Mississippi Steamboat
Story Details
Key Persons
Illinois Sucker
Young Virginian
John Randolph
Location
Mississippi Steamboat
Story Details
An Illinois Sucker mocks a vain young Virginian's pretensions to 'first family' status on a steamboat, flatters him by comparing to John Randolph, offers shoats for a 'second family' introduction, and parts with a jest reminding him of the prank.